G called yesterday evening - when I was relaxing on the sofa, having woke up from a whole afternoon nap ... ! Spoke to your colleague P too, who called. Meeting G for lunch tomorrow at 12:15pm at Marriott - fingers-cross for me, bb. P said the post involves some travelling - including going to US for training. She also thought bb would be going to US in around Sept. ... sigh.

will let you know how it goes tomorrow. miss you much. ...

Had an interview with a private practice firm last week. It went ok. We said we'll meet again mid-August 2007 and if all goes well for them (they only recently opened their offices here), I'll join them January 2008.

If possible, I'd like to go in-house. $$-wise is worse but I don't like marketing and worry about liabilities, etc. Had an interview the hkex this afternoon. I was surprised they asked to see me in the first place. I knew they won't hire me as I don't have the necessary experience and background, but still hold my hope for it as it's a good opportunity. Perhaps I wanted the job quite badly, I was nervous, and consequently, didn't do well in selling myself. I'm never good at selling myself, or I won't be where I am now ... : (

After the interview, it's almost confirmed that I won't be hired. : (

Then, one of the colleagues who'd resigned from here had lunch with my boss, and my boss spoke ill of me in front of my colleague! My boss said he found it difficult to work with me - that I don't follow his instructions, he didn't know what I'm doing and was scared from risk management point of view, ... blah blah blah. They are of course unfounded allegations. My appraisal is coming up in over a month, and I could expect to have more of such unfounded allegations and I would have to swallow them ...

I really want to resign and take a break. My dad advised against it. Realistically, he is right, especially for what I do, but it's hard to soldier on here when your boss is just trying to lay blames on you for his own incompetence.

bb and mm took a short break at Singapore at the weekend just passed. It was fun. Very hot, but quite breezy and of course, we were smart to stay in shopping malls most of the times to enjoy the air-conditioning. : )

I'm told that the weather was awful locally whilst we were away. We were lucky.

We went to nearly all shopping malls that we could possibly get something for ourselves, but ended up getting nothing. The "Great Sale" was on, but we noticed that the stuff there were pretty old-fashioned and we haven't qutie got to that stage/age yet :P Ah yes, we bought food eg the very nice Pandan cake and mult-layer cake at the airport, and I bought 2 elephants from Jim Thompson.

We had wonderful food, from chicken rice, satay etc from hawker centres, to chilli crab at East Coast - yum yum! I was tempted to buy the chilli sauce and make chilli crab when I get back, but I stopped myself knowing that I may not get to that before the sauce expires ... ! :P

Met some of bb's mates - nice bunch.

Deadline fell on 1st day of our holiday - 7 June 2007 - Sigh.

Read newspaper today and noted that from today, we could book tickets for 2008 Olympics. Read the rules and small prints. It feels and in fact works like subscribing for IPOs, as tickets are bound to be over subscribed. Each person could only put in one application, for a maximum of 10 matches, each for a maximum of 4 tickets.

The event would be held in China (and to a small extent, HK), and I guess the weather would be "too hot" for bb to be interested (I was told it was 37C in June, let alone August when the Game would be held). So I have asked my colleague, she will ask her bf and I've also mentioned it to one of my friends. The plan is we would all put in an application for 4 tickets for the matches we are interested to maximise our chances of getting the tickets. It's quite expensive, I mean the tickets plus flight tickets and hotels, but I guess it's a lifetime experience. It's too preliminary to say anything now, but we'll see. At least the thought itself is pretty interesting. : )

These days, I'm learning to offer all my unhappiness and sufferings to the One Above and ask for His comfort. I did that yesterday too, and one of my best friend, CC, called last night! I was thrilled! I've been so unmotivated for the last several months/half year, so much so that there's a lot I wanted to tell her but just couldn't get round to writing emails to her. Then she called! I feel my prayers have been answered; although I also asked for help to be out of here asap, but I feel comforted. Bless her! : )

She's coming back in September, and she has invited me to join their group for skiing in France later this year. I'm tempted. But GBP and Euros are so expensive these days; I've had skiing lessons, but am afraid of heights and could really only stay in Green runs and some low or half-way of Blue runs ...

We are also planning to go to US next year to visit our mutual best friend. Yeah! :D

I forgot to keep a record of last month's deadline, but I feel it's coming in a week or two's time ...

My memory is getting worse these days, probably because I'm getting old. sf called this morning and asked what did I do during the weekend just passed. I had to make an effort to remember it before I could tell him. Oops.

So, last weekend. Well, did nothing and stayed in all day on Saturday. So tired and exhausted, or really, so unmotivated. As sf said this morning, I'm kind of stuck here. The problem is I don't like it here. They pay me ok, but there's not much for me to do and they have not been giving me the credits I deserve. Anyway, enough of moan and groan - what's the point? Things are not gonna change if I continue moaning and groaning. I should focus on the future.

Came across a few in-house positions lately. Although I don't 100% fit the profile they are looking for but I'm tempted to give it a try. I must get my acts together and get it done. I'll try to do my CV tonight. It may need a revamp as they may not want so much details. We'll see.

Sunday was great. Went to have homemade lunch made by bb after Sunday church. Yum yum! bb is such a good chef. I feel a bit guilty though, as she was so hot and wet just because she was making Sunday lunch for us. I enjoyed the 5-star menue immensely, but am a little unhappy as the lunch has made bb tired. She even insisted on cleaning up, whilst I napped on the couch - By now, you must be shouting "What a pig!" I'm so spoiled : P

Have also been thinking about a friend of mine who got married and is staying in Australia. She has liver cancer. I was lazy and haven't emailed her a little while. Then my best friend who also knows this lady in Aussi told me the lady's condition is not looking well. We used to go to the same college and she's just a year ahead of my best friend and I. I emailed her several weeks ago but haven't heard from her ... I'll pray for her.

In fact, several of my friends are not feeling well lately. One is in constant pain in the neck/shoulder area. bb too! I'll remember them all in my prayers.

Haven't received the Holy Communion in the last few weeks, although I went to Sunday mass. Plan to go to do confession after work today. This confession is in fact long overdue ... Hope I can escape then.

been busy with a new probate case. Client was particularly naive - he is generally too late. He has been staying with his mother, keeping her company etc for the last few years, and when she passed away recently, he failed to take the necessary precaution against his relatives and "allowed" them to have raided the property and took away documents and jewlleries, when one of those documents could possibly be a will in his favour, which if that were the case, by now, should have been destroyed and would never see daylight. Sigh.

mm had a marathon of meetings today. The day was quiet before lunch and mm was drafting her monthly article on St. Teresa for the church. Then mm's 1st client called, and they agreed to meet at 3:30pm. Then mm's 2nd client (the one that's involved in a family dispute mentioned in yesterday's post) called to confirm instructions. They agreed to meet at 6pm so that letter of engagement may be signed and cost on account may be given to the firm. mm expected the 2nd meeting to be short but it took nearly 2 hours! mm was sympathetic towards their position and they are new to litigation, and she had to explain her advice on the strategy and way forward again and answer questions again. So eventually, mm was in meetings from 3pm (the 2nd client called and they spoke on the phone) until around 8pm! mm was exhausted!

For purpose of acting for the 2nd client, mm had to report the matter to her boss (Joe). Joe raised the question as to how comfortable we are in involving in probate cases. He said he had only "touched" on contentious probate case! He was honest and mm respected that. mm reminded him of my experience in contentious probate matters and said I intended to involve counsel at early stage, and have advised client of that intention. He suggested sf - yes! mm thought, however, that her boss was easy on this one because the team has been very quiet - to the point that everyone has plenty of capacities! Oops!

bb's comment on mm's post of yesterday made her (mm) day! : D

mm had a marathon of meetings today. The day was quiet before lunch and mm was drafting her monthly article on St. Teresa for the church. Then mm's 1st client called, and they agreed to meet at 3:30pm. Then mm's 2nd client (the one that's involved in a family dispute mentioned in yesterday's post) called to confirm instructions. They agreed to meet at 6pm so that letter of engagement may be signed and cost on account may be given to the firm. mm expected the 2nd meeting to be short but it took nearly 2 hours! mm was sympathetic towards their position and they are new to litigation, and she had to explain her advice on the strategy and way forward again and answer questions again. So eventually, mm was in meetings from 3pm (the 2nd client called and they spoke on the phone) until around 8pm! mm was exhausted!

For purpose of acting for the 2nd client, mm had to report the matter to her boss (Joe). Joe raised the question as to how comfortable we are in involving in probate cases. He said he had only "touched" on contentious probate case! He was honest and mm respected that. mm reminded him of my experience in contentious probate matters and said I intended to involve counsel at early stage, and have advised client of that intention. He suggested sf - yes! mm thought, however, that her boss was easy on this one because the team has been very quiet - to the point that everyone has plenty of capacities! Oops!

bb's comment on mm's post of yesterday made her (mm) day! : D

Had a hard working but very productive weekend. Tidied up the documents that have been on my dining table for some months and cleaned out my fridge on Sat and Sunday respectively. The fridge took me a few hours to do. The things I dumped took up the whole bin for the entire floor! Oops!

Attended a meeting for bible class teachers last night. Before that, attended the 6pm mass hosted by the Rev. Father recently joined the church. He was good! He's Indian, but his local language was excellent! He's so funny and to the point. Simple message, but big ideas. I like him!

The meeting for the bible class was good too. Very useful for someone like me who needed a bit more training. It's also a good place to exchange ideas. I seated next to Father Lok. A member of my Legion team was there. He came after I did. He asked why did I sat there i.e. next to Father Lok. I said another bible class teacher invited me to sit there, so I did. Then that Legion member didn't say much but for the rest of the meeting, he looked at me strangely, as though I picked that seat deliberately, intending to shine shoes for Father Lok. That idea never came across my mind. Why are they so small and shallow?

Had a meeting with a potential client relating to a family dispute. The meeting went well; I spoke to sf and went over my intended advice, so sure win lah! I think they will confirm instructions to us tomorrow. However, it made me very sad, dealing with family disputes, rows between members of the same family. Sigh.

I joined a Planet Yoga last Thursday. It's a life membership - I paid a fixed amount by monthly instalment (interest free) for 2 years, and some GBP 40 per annum after 100 months i.e. over 8 years! I thought it suits me quite well. You see, I'm not persistent in terms of exercising. So, I won't lose out too much if I use it a while/stop a while ... and so on. Good deal, hur?

It's been very quiet in the office. For me, that happened since around Oct/Nov last year. Recently, no new instructions came through the door at all ! So what do I do during the time in the office? Mainly, surfing on the net and socialising with colleagues. Honestly, I am worried that I'd be made redundant soon. That itself is stress. I don't know what to do if that happens ??! I'm beginning to see how courageous, strong and tough my younger brother has been - he's able to face so much downturns that had happened with his career. I love him and admire him immensely.

I got close to a colleague recently. We both have been looking out for opportunities. I tried a few in the interim. For one I was one of 3 shortlisted for 2nd interview, but had heard nothing since early Jan this year; no, not even a rejection. It's a brand name company, and I later heard from the news that it's income was below expectation. As it's a back office post, the company had probably put the matter on hold.

With this colleague and a friend of mine, we were thinking of a business in cakes and ice-creams, and we had even thought about our target customers and marketing. Last week, a friend from Uni calle. It was a friendly call but later we moved onto discussing forming a playgroup ! We said we'll do some research. I'm keen on the idea of moving away from the industry I'm currently at.

I await however God's plan for me. In my prayers, I ask Him for wisdom as well as love, faith and hope in Him. : )

Attending Sunday mass at the usual chapel. We (member of the service team for that chapel) talked about our CNY gathering held last night. I was responsible for one of the games, which was very well received. I was told they all loved it and they were very happy! hee hee!

Picked up KFC and had chicken/chicken wings with bb at her place. We watched some travel/food programs on the tv and after a while, I dozed on her sofa, leaning on her. zzzzz ... I had a few attempts of making red beam and coconut pudding for CNY gathering, and I therefore had a few late nights. It wouldn't set but later, I figured out what went wrong and corrected it. It was successful ! I gave half to bb, and reserved the other half for my family tonight. bb loved it. She's so nice! : )

Had dinner with my family at the usual restaurant, celebrating mum's birthday. My newphew was really something. His family came last. When he enters, he gave a bouquet to mum. It's handmade, made with clay and paper. It's really nice, and of course, his mother helped a lot as the kid only turned 3 a month or so ago. My other sister in law and I each have a small bouquet too. So sweet of him.

They tried my new pudding and thought it was quite good, although a bit sweet. bb said the same thing later. I have improved on the recipe I found for this dessert. It 's now my own recipe. I will start a notebook and write down my recipes, and hopefully, one day, they will be published ! Yes, I am interested in a career with baking/dessert, and perhaps catering but that would be quite hard I reckon. Anyway, I still have a long way to go. My colleague and a friend have been talking about this. We need to be persistent lah!

bb is back today, but I have Legion and deadline ... !

Well, I got 4 more lai see packets before the 15th of CNY - hee hee

It's been a while; the telecon took place on 27 Dec morning. Got to be patient and have faith in Him - that He would only give the best to me ! I may not get it, and that too would be for my own good.

In the interim, I have had the chance of tossing around the ideas of going in-house or stay with private practice. I have decided to go in-house. Not because of what happened yesterday - that my boss tried to play smart - eg the word "however" in paragraph 11 of the draft should be deleted as it's not necessary and it's grammatically wrong. Well, that word was necessary, but I didn't want to argue anymore and just wanted the draft to be finalised and we could issue it. In any event, how can that be "grammatically wrong" ??! It's not an impulsive decision. I have been praying for an indication from Him and in the last few days, I think I got the message - that I should go in-house. In fact, I have got several messages:

1. Dad has always encouraged us to work hard to develop our careers. When I spoke to him a few days ago, he said life is short; what can you do with more $$ ? What's their value? He said he didn't want me to wear myself out.

2. Rev. Father asked after my dad after bible class on Wednesday just passed (17th). He gave several good advice, particularly that I should have a chat with mum and dad separately to see how they are getting on.

3. Before start of bible class on 17th, I heard of the arrangement after the students are baptised in April this year. The new class will start on 18 April and naturally I'm one of the tutors. The difference is for the 1st 10 weeks or so, there would just be me and one other tutor; the other 4 would be on the "bridging class", taking care of the newly baptised. That means I have to be there and on time, and will speak on alternate weeks. Immediately I asked myself if I can give that sort of commitment, but then I think if that's what He wants me to do, He will make sure I can do it.

4. At 101 gathering last night, I met one of the tutors from bible class. She went up to me and said there's something she wanted to tell me for a long time but kept forgetting to do so. She said she thought my presentation (which was 3 weeks ago) was very good. She said I have a good voice. She didn't mean my presentation was dry but only thought if I could include some sharing in it, it would be easier for the studients to understand the messages I was putting across. I am grateful for her encouragement and felt it's another message.

5. The daily scripture on Tuesday (16th) reminds me that God is just. He honours all His promises. A good example is His promise to Abraham that he was blessed and would have many decendants. We need to be patient (Letter to the Hebrews 6:10-20)

So Faith and Patience are what I need now.

There's been quite a bit going on. The first is I fell ill. Had flu for nearly 2 weeks, sometimes it got better, sometimes worse. Now, my voice is sexier than it usually is, so I was told ! :P

Was in bed all day last Sat. Sun - Went shopping with bb for the rest of the day after Church and choir practice. We did a lot of shopping and spent such much that we hit the level for a free hamper from the shopping mall ! Plus entry to a lucky draw for a Benz - if I could get that, it'll be perfect !

Yes, been thinking of getting a car. Initially, it was for work - if they hire me. It's been a while since I met them and they only called yesterday. In the interim, I thought about getting one even if I don't get hired. The reservation is it'd be extra $$$ and I don't really need it. I travel on the tube to get to work, plus buses and taxis etc for leisure. bb is in favour of VW. I do too but insurance would be expensive since I don't have any No Claim Bonus. The idea is to drive parents and go with my family to NT or else on weekends, now that Dad doesn't walk well and won't be travelling far for a while. We'll see.

I'm also in favour of March (Nissan) and A190 (Benz), or even a Volvo ... !

It's been a while since I leave any trace here. Things have happened, of course, but I could not remember them all since I last wrote here without checking my diary and try to remember what happened then. The easier way is to say what happened recently, which to me, has been quite a bit.

My dad had a mild stroke and has been in hospital since beginning of November, and is still there. He's however out of town when that happened and his doctor has advised that he is not to be moved yet. My dad feels dizzy when trying to sit up and doctor said it's dangerous for him to be moved if he cannot even sit up in bed. So he cannot be transferred back here yet.

The worse news mum and us (his children) discovered his affair and apparently, he has a 10 year old son with this other lady! Considering it's my parent's Ruby anniversary (40 years) this year and my nephew will be 3 years old soon, the news is simply too hard to swallow, especially for mum. My brothers have been really good and I've just spent a long weekend away with her. I think she's better now but still, what's going to happen next? No one can tell.

Anyway, bb has been very good. I remember some time ago when I suspected my dad was having an affair, and was upset and cried, bb was always there. As always, she is there for me recently too, for which I'm grateful. We've known each other for so long, and we know each other's family pretty well that it saved me a lot of explanation and makes her understand the situation well. She's great!

It was amber rainstorm warning signal on the Tuesday evening just passed. Notwithstanding that, she kept her promise and stayed with me. I think she didn't do so to keep her promise; I think she knew I needed her and she made herself available to me. It rained so heavily and she had no umbrella that she got herself soaking wet from top to bottom, and her rucksack etc. Raining cats and dogs was an understatement. I felt I was so selfish, but I am truly grateful she came as I really needed her. I missed her a lot. We haven't had much time to ourselves recently, as the time we are available does not seem to coincide with the other's. I've been cutting back on Church duties. Hope I'll see her more often.

We'll be going away for a long weekend - yeah! The purpose of the trip is to visit my dad in the hospital so we probably would have to stay in town during our stay. Unfortunately, it's not a holiday for us, but for me, I get to spend time with bb. That itself is a blessing!

Mum and I will join Father Lok and others on a pilgrimage to Israel and Vatican/Italy. I told Sister Catherine that I would do some homework before I go. I very much treasure this opportunity. It's my first pilgrimage and I get to go to where Jesus was born and lived, and a chance to meet the Pope (although at a distance)! I'm so lucky! If you have read the previous posts, you would know how much I wanted to go - so much so that I was seriously considering resigning if my boss wouldn't allow my leave application! Anyway, I didn't need the ultimatum. :)

What homework? Well, learning and/or refreshing my memory of the significance of the various places that we shall be visiting.

I'm told that there are about 123 of us. Yes, it would be a very big crowd! It will be divided into 3 groups. I don't know if I would be in Father Lok's group, but it doesn't matter - I'm sure the other Fathers are just as good and kind :)

I also suggested to mum that she should do the same too. As Sister Catherine and she are going through the bible, starting from the Old Testament, I suggested that perhaps they could do the New Testament first.

I surfed on the net and came across a website of someone's journal to the Holy Land. I quite like the layout - it started with a summary before going into details. I may do similarly, in due course.

Nothing in particular to note today, at least as of now (the time this post is published is genuine, for a change! hee hee). I finished all my work and in fact, I didn't do much today. I've been surfing. The film Da Vinci Code is coming out soon and the Christianity (Catholics, Church of England and others) have some views about it. Opus Dei issued a statement in reply to what the Director had said too. Below is a copy of it from Zenit.

I spent the afternoon catching up on post of the last few days. Yes, I bit of cheating, I'm afraid. :P

**********************************************************************************

Code: ZE06051502

Date: 2006-05-15

Opus Dei Response to Director Ron Howard

"Catholics Are Victims of an Offense"

ROME, MAY 15, 2006 (Zenit.org).- The press office of the Opus Dei Prelature sent this statement to ZENIT on Friday in response to comments by the director of the soon-to-be-released film "The Da Vinci Code."

* * *

On Thursday the Italian press published interviews with Ron Howard, director of "The Da Vinci Code" film. In statements attributed to him, Howard said that "to deny the right to see the film is a fascist act," and also "to tell someone not to go see the film is an act of militancy and militancy generates hatred and violence." The Opus Dei is mentioned several times in these interviews. The phrases seem to refer to recent statements by Church authorities.

I would ask Ron Howard to keep calm and express himself with respect.

It is not wise to lose sight of the reality of the situation: This film is offensive to Christians. Howard represents the aggressor, and Catholics are victims of an offense. The one offended cannot have his last right taken away, which is to express his point of view. It is not the statements of ecclesiastics or the respectful request of Opus Dei -- to include a notice at the beginning of the film that it is a work of fiction -- which generates violence. It is rather the odious, false and unjust portrayals that fuel hatred.

In his statements, Howard also repeats that it is simply a film, an invented story, and that it must not be taken too seriously. But it is not possible to deny the importance of the movies and literature. Fiction influences our way of seeing the world, especially among young people. It is not right not to take it seriously. Artistic creativity certainly needs a climate of freedom, but freedom cannot be separated from responsibility.

Imagine a film that says that Sony was behind the attacks on the Twin Towers, which it promoted because it wanted to destabilize the United States. Or a novel that reveals that Sony paid the gunman who shot the Pope in St. Peter's Square in 1981, because it was opposed to the Holy Father's moral leadership. They are only invented stories. I imagine that Sony, a respectable and serious company, would not be happy to see itself portrayed in this way on the screens, and that it would not be satisfied with an answer such as "Don't worry, it's only fiction, it mustn't be taken too seriously, freedom of expression is sacred."

In any case, those who have taken part in the film's project have no reason to be concerned. Christians will not react with hatred and violence, but with respect and charity, without insults or threats. They can continue to calculate tranquilly the money they will make on the film, because the freedom of financial profit seems to be in fact the only sacred freedom, the only one exempt from all responsibility. They will probably make a lot of money, but they are paying a high price by deteriorating their prestige and reputation.

I hope the controversy of these months will not be sterile but serve to reflect on the relative character of financial profit when high values are involved; on the importance of fiction; on responsibility, which always supports and protects freedom.

[The statement added:]

The plan of Opus Dei's Communication Office in regard to this case may be found on the Web page www.opusdei.org, which explains in detail its position over these months.

[From] Manuel Sánchez Hurtado, in charge of relations with the international press, at the Opus Dei's press office in Rome

bb returns from her business trip yesterday. She called me in the office when she was waiting for her baggage by the conveying belt. So nice of her! But very soon, she sounded irritated and we didn't speak for long.

Did I say anything wrong? I guess I have. Sorry lah!

It's Mother's Day today. Went to Sunday Church in the morning and met mum for lunch at noon. She was happy to see the bouquet. Of course, it's from me! hee hee.

I also gave a bouquet to Ms. Chu. She didn't look at it much. She was busy collecting money for donation, doing this and that. Anyway, I noticed that she was a bit agitated. A few others noticed it too.

I told her I might not be there next Sunday. Before I told her the reason, she asked if I would be doing work for Legion of Mary. So smart! I told her I might be needed for the Procession of Mary Mother for Legion of Mary, but am waiting to be told what needs to be done. Then she said I couldn't escape from Father Lok. I don't know whether that was a positive, negative or neutral comment. But as Sister Catherine taught me, I should do what I think it is right. I think helping God through her Church is good and right. Even if Ms. Chu doesn't like it as she prefers us to stay with CC, I can't help it. And you are right, I'm not leaving CC, so sometimes, I'm a bit lost on what exactly is the issue or the problem.

Other members of CC also help their own parish church, but they keep quiet about it, and didn't tell Ms. Chu. If CC's event clashes with their obligations with other church, they just say they would be busy or not available.

I wasn't going to tell her, but she guessed it.

Lunch was good. There was just mum and I. We both enjoyed it. Then we went back to her home. We spent time chatting, and she taught me how to make flowers with ribbon (those you would put on gifts after you have wrapped them). We shared our believe and talked about our pilgrimage this year too. I felt close to her and very much enjoyed the time with her. I hope she feels the same too.

At the end of our lunch, I asked mum if I am any different to before I was baptised. She said yes. She said I'm a lot more energetic now. She said before that, when she called me on Sunday, I'm usually in bed and sometimes, she was afraid to call or she would wake me up. Asking me to join them for dim sum lunch was bad. Either I would say yes, I'll be there in an hour as I needed to wash myself and travel there, or I would ask them not to count on me as they would have to wait for me lah. It was so funny when she said it. Yes, I remembered I said those things myself. Mum said at least now, they get to see me more often and there is better hope for me to join them for dim sum lunch and dinner. I was a bit ashamed of myself, being such a bad daughter.

I'll work on it and improve on it. God help me lah!

For dinner, we stayed at home and she cooked. My brothers and their families joined us too. The food was excellent. Mum is the best cook! The atmostphere was good too.

My sister-in-law said my younger brother and she would be going on pilgrimage this summer too! What co-incidence! They too are going to Israel, although they won't be going to the Vatican. Instead, they would be going to Egypt. That's natural, as they belong to the Church of England; the Vatican doesn't have special meaning to them. Their trip would start on the last few days of ours, so I may not see them much around that time.

It's a wonderful day. My heart is filled with love and joy! Alleluia!

A lot happened today:

1. Sam's admission

Yes, I did it! I moved Sam's admission to be a solicitor of the local courts. It's my first time. Got up early, got into the office first to collect the robe and took a taxi to the Court. I was there even before her and her boyfriend! ha ha ha!

I made a few amendments to the speech yesterday and she approved of it. I practised that speech a few times. I was a bit nervous and prayed before I left office that I won't mess things up for Sam!

It went ok, I think. There were only about 11 to be admitted. We started just after 9:30am and finished by around 10:30 am at the most. Then we had champagne at the Shangri-la and stayed there chatted until around 12 noon. bb called my mobile and we spoke in the interim. :) They booked a table for lunch at a very nice restaurant but I wasn't keen. I said I'll do some shopping - need to look for a departure gift for my secretary. And I went to my brother's office to return the robe to him (He borrowed it from his friend for me), stayed there a little while before I went to do a little shopping. Didn't buy anything at all. I think a Burberry wallet would be quite nice but it's slightly out of budget. So, I'm still considering it.

2. Shopping at the local convent garden

Tomorrow is Mother's Day. I thought about getting something for mum. Eventually, I opted for flowers. I don't think she receives bouquet often so I think that'll be rather nice. All female like flowers, right?

So I shopped at the local convent garden. I must have went round that market a few times as I spent some 2 hours there! I didn't have anything in mind and when I did, I couldn't get fresh and nice ones for my mum, and had to look for alternatives. I wasn't going to buy anything for Ms. Chu but then a thought came to my mind and thought it would be nice to get her some flowers too. So I did eventually. She's an elderly lady, having limited families afterall. Whatever happened, happened. I should open my heart and put it in the past. I felt happy for being able to put it behind and have a "big (or bigger) heart" . :)

3. Mass and class

Yes, then went to the Anticipated Mass and the post-baptism class. I deliberately went there early to join the others to say a Rosary before that mass. I thought I might be a little late so I walked pretty fast from the flower market to the church, but I got there just in time - hee hee!

I felt very good after the mass, as it's one of those I concentrated well. My mind and thoughts didn't wonder off too much. I like this week's Gospel. It has a lot of depth and I like this in particular: "Abide in me, and I in you." I feel so close to Him, especially when I received the Communion. It's so romantic!

The class was good too. Lot's of fun! The group is pretty nice and a few of us have a good sense of humour so we often have a good laugh ! :D

4. Wrapping papers and ribbons

After that, I looked for wrapping papers and ribbons. I needed to arrange the flowers into a nice (or at least, acceptable) bouquets for mum and Ms. Chu. I was late and a lot of the stationery shops on my way home were already closed. By the time I got everything and got home, it was already 11 pm. I had something to eat and then started the flower arrangements. No, I never learnt how to do it and I'm not artistic. When I was young and was attending school, my artistic works that needed to be handed in (as it was part of the curriculum) were finished most by my sister at my mum's request. My sister often couldn't understand why she had to pick up the pieces for me. You see, I usually left those artistic homeworks until the last minute and usually after the clock had struck 10:30pm or 11pm, I would have started a little bit of it but would be stuck, or started to sob, or something, then my mum would come to help. When either she had something else to do or when she too was stuck, she would ask my sister to help me out. She was young too and often she had to climb out of bed to help me! ha ha ha! Thinking back, it sounds so funny and a lot of memories come back to me. Only if my sister is here to share those memories with me now. But I should wish that she's now in heaven, be with our Father, enjoying peace and everlasting life. And I will see her again one day. I suppose I better be good from now on or I may not go to heaven to see her lah! :P

It took me 2 hours to finish wrapping two bouquets, which are not big at all ! By the time I finished, it was already 2am. I didn't realise it was so late, but I enjoyed doing it. :)

I visited Legion of Mary for the 3rd time this evening. Before that, I sent an email to Father Lok enquiring if that'll be ok. He said I was most welcome. Bless him!

I enjoy those visits. That praesidium was good. Good spirit and enthusiastic. I discussed with Father Lok - because I would be starting a short course for the newly baptised then will be joining Father Lok to pilgrimage, he suggested me to start my 3-month probation as member of the Legion in August after we return from pilgrimage. In the meantime, I could still visit them.

After the meeting, I stayed a little while to chat with the others then went home. They asked me to join them to grab something to eat. I declined as I wanted to go home early as I needed to get up early for Sam's admission. I'm meeting them at 8:45am in Court ! Feeling very honoured and privileged to be asked to do so for her. :)

In my previous entries, I mentioned that Father Lok had asked me to write an article for the local Catholic newspaper, which was inviting sharing from the to-be-baptised. I did and Father Lok edited it for me. It was then published - not once but twice! Yes, twice! I wort of knew about the first one - I wasn't sure if the Editor of the newspaper would publish mine, although Father Lok used to be the Chief Editor of that newspaper. I don't want it to be a matter of "giving face" to him. I take pride in my work. If the current Chief Editor didn't want to publish it, for whatever reasons, I was relaxed about it.

On Good Friday this year (14 April 2006), I went to mum's local church to attend mass. The then current issue of the Catholic newspaper was available and somehow, I was motivated to get one (I am not a regular to that newspaper). Soon after I started reading it, I found an article whose author shares the same name as mine. When I read the first few sentences, I thought that was familar and I realised it's my article - again! The title the Editor gave to the article is different to the other they published and they also edited the last sentence of it. But it's the second time they published it! I am thrilled and feel very privileged! It's probably part of God's plan - He knows I needed further encouragement and confidence for my baptism on the following day, 15 April 2006. Praise to God!

I told bb and on 15 April 2006 night, after my baptism at St. Teresa's Church, she bought several copies of it. She took one for herself and did a draft translation for it and asked me to finalise it. She suggested and I agreed that I should get it translated and post it here. But because of the various preparation, and that I needed to take care of my teacher, I haven't got round doing so. But very nice and considerate and thoughtful bb had already done it. God bless her!

Here it is - to share with you.

**********************************************

I attended Catholic schools since I was young, which means I have heard of and am fairly familiar with the bible stories and God's teachings since I was young. I have yet to be baptised; partly because I didn't know I could make such request, partly because I consider it more important that one truly and sincerely believes in Christ, that one believes with all his heart and soul; baptism was a mere formality. I live my life with as much adherance to God's teachings as possible, whilst admittedly, my understanding of God's Words is limited. I wanted to show that I am a Christian, a Jesus' follower, by my faith, by my actions and how I live my life, and not by the Certificate of Baptism that the Church issues to those who are formally baptised. During this time, many asked if I believed in God, and I answered "I do" with no hesitation. The thing is, if I do, why am I not a Catholic/Christian? I don't know how to answer!

About two years ago at a turning point in my life, I took stock of my relationship with God. I was struck with the need to properly acknowledge God's love for and graces to me. I started taking catechumen lessons. I guess many people start to know Him from attending those lessons, whereas I had already decided to follow Jesus when I started those lessons.

In early February this year at a social gathering, I learnt that I might be baptised this year. In mid-February, I met Father Lok of St. Teresa's Church. Not only did he allow me to be baptised this year, he offered to be my tutor for my distance learning course! I am so lucky! It has always been my wish to be God's child. Although I had missed/ignored the many opportunities He had given me in the past, yet He still welcomes me to His family! He saw to my need and had already made all the arrangements for me even before I prayed and asked for them!

It is hard to describe how I felt at the time. To draw an analogy, it felt like getting engaged or married to the person you love, whom you have dated for a long time and knew that he was "The One." The ecstasy of the engagement was mixed with a little trepidation too. I went through a period of introspection. Would my enthusiasm for God fade away after the glitter fades? Will I become yet another lapsed Catholic thus somewhat bring embarrassment to Him and to the Church? Can I be a good Christian/follower? I don't want to embarrass the Church because of my immaturity; that I have rushed things without thinking it through.

Becoming a member of the Catholic family is both formal and solemn. It is a life-long promise to God; it is a vow to Him. Some of my friends thought it was no big deal; but I am privileged to have the support and encouragement from Father Lok, my teachers who taught me catechumen, my family, my godfather and friends.

The preparation for baptism was demanding. If one were to do a proper job, one would have to sacrifice a lot of his personal time and activities. Take for example, I was unable to attend a gathering today as the first pre-baptism ceremony was going to be held. Some friends asked, "why is it so difficult to become a Catholic? Don't you only need to "believe"?" How can I explain this to the non-Catholics? Simply put is that this pre-baptism ceremony could bring me closer to God. Notwithstanding the various pressures, I find joy in all these meetings and preparation.

It is now about a month till Easter. Most of the butterflies in my stomach had been settled and I have diligently made all preparations for my baptism. The remaining question is if I could sustain my passion and my love for God and for the Church. I don't have an answer to this question. I could, and would, only do my best to fulfil my Christian duties; pray more and harder, and ask for God's help that by the graces I would receive through my baptism, that my love and passion for Him and His Church would grow stronger, and stronger. And I would also ask God to give me confidence and courage that I would need to spread the Good News and joy to everyone around me.

I look forward to Easter to arrive, when through baptism, I shall appear with a whole new identity.

- 4 March 2006

Slept until around 9:30am / 10am. Slept quite well. Heart wasn't pounding too hard then. Around mid-morning, my teacher called to congratulate me. Dad was arriving this afternoon and mum and him were to have dim sum tea. I was invited too, but I declined and said I would rather stay at home to prepare myself for tonight.

This is the day I've been waited for so long! As I said in the article that was published in the local Catholic newspaper, I have always wished and longed to be God's child. And yes, it's gonna be tonight! It's taken me a long time and a long way to God but from this evening onwards, I shall be one of His children.

Like yesterday, I read the bible and more from Benny and Priscilla's book. Prayed. Surfed a while. Eat a bit too much, I guess it's comfort eating. Went to local shop to get the sponge for applying make up foundation. What else? May be watched a bit of TV. Then I started to get change and get ready.

Left home around 5 pm in the end. I was going to leave a bit earlier but somehow, time flew quickly. Got to St. Teresa's church at around 6pm. Sat at the garden where they honour St. Mary, prayed and had a granary roll and some water. The ceremony would last until 11pm and there would be no time for dinner. After I've been to the washroom and let people know that I had arrived, I entered the church, and prayed more. I could really feel the anxiety.

At around 7pm, met with my Godfather and I led him to our seat. He gave me a crucifix that has been blessed by Father, and a wallet-sized card. I said that's great as I can put his card in my wallet that would be with me wherever I go. :)

My family and friends gradually arrived. They were my family - my parents, my two brothers, Anita, bb; my ex-colleagues - Monita and Isana; CC members - Patrick, Winnie, Yolanda, Joseph, Zeno and Catherine; from King's - Peter, Stephen, Arthur and Peter's friend who came from Japan; and from Bedford Girls - Barbara, Emily and Paulina. Almost two dozen - wow!

Before the ceremony formally started, Father Lok reminded us what to do and of the run-down, and we rehearsed for baptism and the receiving of candles representing the light.

It formally started shortly after 8pm. It started with Lighting of Candles. All lights in the church was switched off. Father Lok blessed the flame and lit the Special Candle. Then the several Fathers, Deacon Tse and alter boys entered, followed by several readings from the Old Testament. This part of the ceremony wasn't in mum's baptism ceremony.

The second part the ceremony started very much like a mass. The additional bit was to baptise 140 of us, and for us to receive the Confirmation, followed by the Holy Eucharist/Communion. As there were so many of us to be baptised and even more to receive the Holy Communion, I reckon all relevant hymns in that hymn book were sung! I have, of course, taken the advantage of learning a few new ones!

As soon as the ceremony was over, we took a group photo. Actually, I'm not sure if it was taken as I thought I heard the cameramen saying that the group was too large. We were then broken up into several smaller groups according to the catechumen classes. Then I was called by my parents, or was it my friends I could not recall. I only remember that when I was getting change after I got home, I regretted not having had a photo with Father Lok alone. I was busy socialising with my various friends. I really wanted to thank him personally. Although I can still do it when I see him next time, like in the next two months, I would be attending his "consolidation class" every Saturday evening, 7:15pm. But it won't be on the same occasion. My elder brother told me that Father Lok had been surrounded by the crowd and left pretty soon afterwards, so there wasn't much chance for that anyway.

I have taken a shower and cleaned off all make ups. I've also opened the gifts I've received. I am still thrilled and too excited, and couldn't quite sleep or wouldn't want to sleep quite as yet. I know I must as I need to pick up Ms. Chu at around 8:15pm to go to CC. It's already passed 2am. I must do what I must do. I pray that I would not get up too late tomorrow. :P

Today is Good Friday, and it's the first day of the 4-day public holidays. bb is returning from her trip today.

Got up around 9/10 am; not too early, not too late. Read the bible and the book from Benny and Priscilla that they gave me as my baptism gift. It's really good! It's Father Choi's preaching of the Sunday Gospel for Year B. It's a great book. All articles used simple words without losing their depths. Father Choi is the Supervisor of the Religious and Theological Section with Holy Spirit Seminary College. The book is a collection of all articles Father Choi wrote for Year B in 2001 that were published in the local Catholic newspaper.

Then went to the special mass for Good Friday. Met mum there and then went home with her, chatted and had dinner with her before going home.

Read a bit more bible and the book. Did a facial and an eye mask - yes, in preparation for tomorrow - hee hee. Slept ok. Yes, I am excited about tomorrow, but it's still under control and it hasn't affect my sleep. I prayed that I could have a good night sleep as tomorrow will be a long day. My prayer has been answered. Praise to Him!

Today is the last day at work before the 4-day public holiday, celebrating Easter. My colleagues collectively gave me a baptism gift and a card, giving me all the good and warm wishes. How very nice of them! Some of them are even not Christian!

I went into the office late today, quite usual lately as there was nothing to do. When I got into my office, I was hit by a huge bouquet of flowers! It's really huge! They smelt gorgeous! It's from William, congratulating me in advance for my baptism. It's so nice of him! He's going to Taiwan over the weekend on business and could not come to the ceremony.

It's Holy Thursday. There was a special mass at Catholic Centre at 5:30pm then there'll be bible sharing at 8pm; same place. I could have made to the mass on time but I wanted to drag 2 of my colleagues, who are lapsed Catholic to it too. One had a medical appointment and couldn't go anyway. The other was going to go but when the clock struck, she needed to speak to the stupid partner ... Well, same old story, nothing new. So, I went on my own and joined from Father Russell's preaching.

Had lunch with a few CC friends. Sharing started shortly after 8pm and continued until after 10pm. It was good; Benny led us and he was, as always, very well prepared. It was a little longer than usual as one of the attendees talked about her children, how to teach them ... things that are irrelevant to what was discussed and to be discussed. If Benny had not intervened a few times, sharing might take a bit longer. Not that I mind the length of bible sharing. Bible sharing is good. I like them. But not sharing re how to teach children and re comparison between Catholics and the Church of England, for example.

After that, I rushed back to the office to get the bouquet and back to CC to take my teacher home. I didn't want to bring it to CC earlier to avoid attention and questions! A few of them saw it and was envy how wonderful the bouquet was. But they didn't ask any questions, or there wasn't much time for them to do so because soon, my teacher and I got into a taxi and left. Surprising, my teacher didn't ask any question either. My teacher is a nice person, but pretty nosy sometimes. If I answer the phone in front of her, she would ask who it was and so on. Somehow I didn't want to say anything, not that there was anything to hide, but just don't feel like "reporting." So, I would just smile. :)

On the way to my office, Benny and Priscilla gave me a book as my baptism gift. It's from Father Choi. It's his preaching on the Sunday Gospel for Year B, which is the current liturgical year. Many thanks to them. I asked them for their autograph on the book too! hee hee.

My secretary gave me a present today! It's a 2 in 1 : belated birthday present and for my baptism. It's an instrumental CD. She bought it from Catholic Centre gift shop and all music are hymns. Although not vocal, but you can still feel the joy and power from the music. It's very nice. I've downloaded it onto my mini ipod and have been listening to it on route. And there's a birthday card too! :)

The African violet my friend gave me when she returned to Canada is really blossoming! Wow! Take a look (insert picture)!

First day back to work after bbmm's birthday trip. Called sf and spoke to him. He claimed to have sent me a sms on my birthday. I said I didn't get it. It transpired that he remembered it wrongly - he thought it's the 5th! What an idiot!

My boss asked about my trip. I said it was good, but I have allergy probably because of the difference in weather. He looked at me as though the allergy is contagious! Does he have any common sense??!

My teacher asked if I could take her home tonight. I debated about that throughout the day. At the end, time permits so I did. I tried to avoid that because I didn't want her to rely heavily on me again, like what she did before the Korean trip. I felt pressure and wasn't too happy about it. In the end, I left it with Him. I didn't think I could make it anyway because I was waiting for my boss' comments on a draft email, but at around 6:30pm, he said he didn't need me to finalise the email and that I could go. I thought if God has made it possible, I should do as He wanted me to and go with the flow. In the end, it wasn't a bad ride, although I was still a little tired.

When we got to her flat, she gave me a pen (which by Tuesday pm, I still haven't opened it) and a holy cross key ring. I told her I have plenty of pen and key rings, and she should give them to the needy ones. She insisted. So I accepted them and said I shall treat them as a gift from her for my baptism, and I shall accept no more gifts.

The fact is throughout the years, I have been various pens of various brands, but I still prefer the biro from Stablio - they are cheap but very good!

Finished the rest of the homeworks Father Lok asked me to do and sent them to him before I left office. I congratulated myself for having made them before my baptism this Saturday! hee hee.

Didn't sleep much last night. After I unpacked some of the stuff from the suitcase and showered, it's already past midnight. Watched a bit of TV. I think I went to sleep at around 2am, but then I was waken up by my skin allergy - my limbs felt so itchy! I already put medicated ointment on them straight after I showered, so it subsided at the time, but it came back! So I got up and put a fresh layer on them and slept for a few more hours before getting up for Sunday Church. That was difficult and I felt sooooooo tired! If it was any regular service, I might have skipped that service and attend another, but we have bible sharing and choir practice for broadcast on 23 April 2006, so.

After the service, we (other church members and I) went for dim sum lunch, as usual. After bible sharing and choir practice, it's already 5pm. Two other members and I saw my teacher and another member (who's taking her home) to a taxi and we took the tube. Then I met up with bb at the foot massage place. We didn't speak much. We were both tired. But it's nice to have her around.

Then I went to have dinner at my elder brother's place with his family and mum. Then went home. Went to sleep soon after midnight and having surfed a little. Slept better that night.

We went to Seoul for 4 days, between 4 and 9 April 2006. That covers both our birthdays and yes, that's our birthday trip!

We left here by a midnight flight on 5 April 2006, and got there by around 5am. Took the airport bus and got to Seoul by around 7am. It stopped right in front of the hotel (Sejong Hotel). Great! We were lucky and was able to check in and go to our room straight away without needing to pay extra!

We both thought the location of our hotel was great. It's at the back of Myung Dong and we could take a stroll after dinner. And we did.

1st day

We slept a bit on the plane and a bit more after we got to our room, since we thought the shops wouldn't be opened so early anyway. We started at around 10/11am, had lunch (bb took me to a nice place where they serve only 3 things - ginseng chicken, roast chicken and roast chicken set, I think) and looked around the area and also covered Namdaemum market. We had the famous barbecue for dinner. It was a eat-all-you-can dinner and we had the famous beef rib, beef and pork belly. Yum!

2nd day

Went to the famous Catholic church. When we got there, a wedding ceremony was taking place. All lights were lit. It's beautiful!

Then we took the City Tour bus. We did some investigation on the 1st day. It offers 3 routes - the Palace route (obviously it goes round all palaces), Downtown route (this covers the major tourists shopping areas and palaces) and a Night tour. We were going to go for Downtown route followed by the Night City route, but in the end, we only did the Downtown route. Sight-seeing a bit on the tour bus and went to Insa-dong where we had a wonderful brunch at a family-style restaurant. It's in a traditional Korean house so we got to experience eating in an Ondol - great and so was the food! We went to Changdeokgung Palace and joined the 3pm tour (you have to join a tour as that's the only way you can go in). That was nice too and we took some photos.

Then we took the City Tour bus and went to Itaewon. We didn't like it that much; there wasn't much to see and we stayed for about 30 minutes and took the next City Tour bus and went back to Myong Dong. We ate at a local fast food shop and I had my favourite bean curd soup set, while bb had beef in clear soup - Yum!

Poor bb's feet were hurting and mm gave her a short back massage when we returned to the hotel at the end of the day.

3rd day

We started with Namsan Traditional Korean Villege. There's a park adjacent to it and we walked around there too. We both thought it was good and enjoyed it immensely. It's fascinating to see the traditional Korean house.

Then we went to Insa-dong again - we both like it there! Got a few more things. Also covered Dongdaemum market - That's ok too. We dropped the shoppings at our hotel first before heading for another nice dinner - raw beef and "magic hot pot." After dinner, we walked around and tried the famous Korean Sauna. We both thought it was rather nice. :)

4th day

As we were leaving at around 4/5pm, we stayed around the area - Myung Dong/Namdaemum market. We had afternoon tea at a lovely teahouse we came across on the first day but we were too full then. It's famous for its green tea and we had a different one to try. It's very nice!

By around mid-day, we were both a bit bored as we have seen everything we wanted to see by then. In fact, we must have walked around the area 3/4 times! We decided to go to the airport earlier as we were pushed for something to do to kill the time.

We had early dinner at the airport. I had ginseng chicken again while bb had beef soup. Yum! The quality was even better than those we had in the last few days, and the price we thought were very reasonable!

We took the afternoon flight back and by the time we got home, it's already close to midnight.

A.O.B.

We had lots of snacks offered on the street. Yum! I reckoned I have put on a few pounds after this trip!

We also travelled by the local tube. It's quite convenient and easy to use. I found the local people very friendly. We agreed that they are probably somewhere between the Japanese and the Chinese i.e. not too pretentious and rather polite. We both like it there and thought it's a good short break. We'll probably go back again in future.

While we were there, we considered going to Lotte World and as it would take up a whole day, we thought we'll do that next time.

You can ski in Korea in the winter too ...

Yes, it's my birthday today and I think it's worth recording what I did today, so many years after, I can read back to myself. :)

My first date - Made an effort to attend the morning service at 7:15am at the local church. well, I was a bit late and by the time I got there, Father was preaching on that day's Gospel. The service finished at around 7:45am. I felt good after that.

Then went to Park n' Shop to get a few groceries. Got home and had some of the remaining dishes in my fridge. You see I'm flying tonight (midnight, 5 April 2006) and have to kill all parishable food in my fridge before then. Surfed a while, listened to Father Lok's preaching from the net, watched a bit of TV, then left to attend my second date - meeting Sister Catherine at St. Clare's.

Got there at around 11:30am. Mum was there already. She showed us around the newly decorated school. Wow, it's fantastic! We went to have dim sum lunch at Mum's favourite restaurant then we parted. I went to Catholic Centre to get a birthday card for Father Lok - It's his birthday on 6 April, 2 days after mine! :)

Then went home and wrote the card. It took me a bit of time to think about what to say in it plus a bit of time to draft it. After that was done, I started packing. didn't take me long. Soon after that, bb called and went through her checklist with me - smack!

Finished the rest of the food in the fridge, took a shower, changed and I was on my way to the airport!

During the day, I got several calls and various sms from my friends. One of those sms was from a friend at Sunday church. Nothing from sf, notwithstanding we met briefly this afternoon so that I could return a DVD to him. I don't think he has forgotten about it, but he has remembered it wrongly!

I didn't plan to visit my teacher tonight, but she called and asked for my help to delivery something urgent for her to Dominican of which she's a member. Besides, I obtained further information re the peaceful alarm and I wanted to get it settled and fixed before I go away next week. So I went to see her after work.

We talked about the alarm. She agreed, finally! I'll speak to that company and get it done asap.

Another lady member was there when I got there. We had a good conversation. That member was there when my teacher interviewed the part-time helper. We discussed it afterwards. That part-time helper sounded promising. I asked my teacher to ask her other student (who's going to pay for the service) to take a look and to deal with other matters for her, as a sign of respect at the very least. She agreed.

Just as I anticipated, my teacher is thinking of going back to CC full-time, 7 days a week. I tried to talk her out. She'll start part-time first. Let's see how she gets on.

Told my teacher that I'll be away next week. She asked where I'm going and with whom. I told her the destination and that I'll be going with "a friend". hee hee. Guess what she said? She said I don't look like someone who would get married! Oh no!

Just when I want to go yoga, it's often bad timing.

Sister Catherine came to attend the mass at our chapel this morning. It's very nice to see her again! Didn't speak much with her - she came around 9:15am, then she prayed. Soon after that, I had choir practice until beginning of the mass. Obviously, no talking then. After the mass, the conductor for our choir saw her and spoke to her. I only spoke to her after that. That was brief and I saw her to the taxi. Although I didn't give her a copy of the newspaper with my article published, I told her about it and she said she should have a copy of it at home.

Had a fairly long discussion with other members re my teacher's plan to go to work in April. She walks fairly well, but she doesn't manage steps and slopes well. She doesn't have much confidence in them. Ideally, the part-time helper could take her to the MTR station too after her work at my teacher's place. I had a discussion with my teacher after I brought her home. I suggested may be she could work part-time, at least to start with, thus get more exercise and get the strength back. She works long hours at the chapel and involves a lot of hard work. She agreed without much resistance! I'm grateful to God! I prayed and prayed in the last few days, and God has again answered my prayer! Thanks be to God!

Re the "bell for peace of mind", she's a little resistant to it, even when I've asked for it as my baptism gift! She's concerned about the cost. I made enquiry this evening (yes, they are open - 24/7). It's about GBP 8 per month if we were going to rent one, or GBP 5 per month if we were to purchase a new one for her at around GBP 180. I'm thinking of absorbing the cost myself, probably go for rental. Is a burden to me, particularly psychologically, but pecuniary-wise, it's not that much. What does bb think?

I was moody today. Could be because it's pre-deadline. I think because I feel unjust - that I'm doing a lot of my teacher and whilst a few others are also doing so, they don't take any initiative! It's such a big cultural difference! Not just in terms of different countries, but also I think different work environment. In the industry I'm working at, you are trained to be proactive. It may also be because my teacher criticised me unjustly yesterday or on the day before. Further, I'm frustrated at not having enough private time, that too much has been given to her. I know she needs me now, and that I should not feel that way. She kept saying she wants to be independent and she's working very hard on it. Sometimes, I think whether I'm doing all these as part of repentance for the blunders I've made against Him in the past and perhaps still doing. I asked for His forgiveness again and again, but I'm still making the same mistake. But I feel better now. Let's put it behind me.

We should "love each other as we love ourselves." I've been adequately provided for and was given the gift of bb. I should be more generous to the needy. :)

I have also prayed hard that I be rescued from where I work. I'll keep at it.

Been spending hours on the phone in the last two days, liaising with church members re home visits chez my teacher. They are not difficult people and I believe they are actually nice people. The problem is I feel the difference - big difference - I take initiative and would deal with things as quickly as I can unless there are things that are beyond my control. The others are generally otherwise.

What happened was I sent an email to the Sunday Group to fix next week's schedule early. I told them weekend and going to church is no problem - I'll deal with it. I also said I'll go on Wednesday, and asked others to fill other gaps.

Up till now, there's no reply other than 2. Then I have to deal with 2 long-winded mums but at least, now things are finalised. And that's not via email but telephone. I did ask what would be easiest to them - should I send email to them or call them on the phone. They asked messages to be sent via email. But what's the point when no one bothers to reply??!

They are so passive; or I'm too proactive! I winged at my secretary today about this. I said now I understand why Fr. Lok has his eyes on me! I'm so proud of my intelligence - well, I've been well-trained by bb! :P

wore black today, but with the pashmina bb brought me from India recently. That makes it very outstanding and became the focus of my style and what I was wearing today.

The weather today was bad - grey and drizzled from time to time. When I was walking to the tube station this morning, I congratulated myself for being happy. The pashmina felt soft and very warm, and I believe I have a wonderful smile on my face.

I'm grateful for what God has given me. I kept thinking of Him and thanked Him profusely while walking to the tube station. I'll thank him properly tonight - for this and for sending me to Fr. Lok, and through him, for all the encouragement He has given me.

I feel showered with love. :)

My article has been published! I just checked my office email (some instinct drove me doing so - told by God??) and got an email from Fr. Lok. It took me a while to disencode it. It's an email from him informing me that my article is published in this week's Catholic newspaper, on page 8. How every nice and caring of him! Bless him!!

It's the article that Fr. Lok asked me to prepare. It's about how I feel now, whilst waiting to be baptised this year. I spent quite some time to prepare it. I really did put my heart and soul to it. The coincidence is that my thought somehow matches that of Bishop Zen's (as he then was) - In my article, I drew an analogy of a couple who has been dating for a long while and when they have agreed to tie the nod, other than feeling thrilled, I am also concerned - if I'll ever be a good Christian and follow Jesus for the rest of my life. At the 2nd pre-baptism ceremony, Bizhop Zen drew a similar analogy. He said we are going to be "married" to the Church this Easter! I've always said I took my baptism very serious and see it as something most important to my life, even to marriage. An article about that ceremony with Bishop Zen's quote is also published in this issue of the Catholic newspaper.

It's the first time that my work gets published in newspaper, other than written submissions that I prepared on the Lady's case and were adopted by the trial judge in whole as part of his judgment. The entire judgment was overturned last year, except the part that I prepared, which was not even subject to appeal! Yes, I bit of self-praising! ha ha ha!

I must get this week's issue - 2 or 3 copies? One for myself, one for sister Catherine as she has asked for it. Should I get one for Ms. Chu/Sunday Church?? May be I'll just show them mine.

For sure, I'll be showing it to bb. No escape lah - sorry! :P :D

I gave our financial adviser's name and contact details to my secretary. Hope it'll be helpful to both of them. :)

Had dinner with my parents - and I got a present from them! wow!! it's a pendulum! It made up of 3 pearls of different colours, and mum decided on the way they are arranged together. How very nice and thoughtful!

Dinner was generally great. Dad reminds me to remind my brothers to look for properties as he considered the market will go up soon.

I've asked Dad not to fly back here a few days just to attend my baptism ceremony. My guess is he'll come. That'll be great! I hope that Dad could feel the love of God and follow Him one day.

Sent an email to Sunday church members re next week's schedule, as my teacher will go there this Sunday and it would be inconvenient to discuss the matter then.

I've started on another module on my distance-learning course for my baptism. The first paper is about 10 commendments. The short question is what are my thoughts on the content of that paper. I had a bit of difficulty and took me a bit of time to come up with something to say. Yes, I can say so crap but I want to think about it and share my honest view with Fr. Lok. He's such a good teacher.

Then I read today's scripture. It's exactly on point (Matthew 5:17-19)! Another co-incident! This year's Year B and we are sharing the Gospel of Mark. I don't know why today's scripture is Matthew. I've noticed that there was a day or two when they read Luke. May be it's a question I can ask Father or my teacher.

That reading came with meditation and it inspired me re my answer to the short question.

Because I've been taking care of my teacher, I haven't done much homework lately. Now my brothers and sisters in Christ are helping out (see my other post of today's date). I better get on with it at full speed.

My brothers and sisters in Christ has been pretty good, so far. We drew up a schedule and each of us will take turn to visit my teacher during the week to keep her company. A sister in Christ and I went on Monday. I went earlier to have my lesson and when she came, we chatted. I also went to my teacher's place although it's not my turn as I have a delivery for her. I stayed briefly and left.

If you ask me if I worry about her, hmm, I guess the answer is yes, a bit. But I'm letting go of it. She's not mine and mine alone. She's all the brothers and sisters'. And I need time for bb, my family and for myself.

I'm grateful for my brothers and sisters' cooperation. They were passive; no one took initiative like me to do what I've been doing except 2 both are housewives. Whilst they would ask after her, no one went to visit her! But when they were asked to do so, they agreed. How strange. May be because I know my teacher recently whereas many of the others know her since they were young and they see her someone in authority and are a bit scared of her.

I'm going to have dinner with my parents tonight. Then tomorrow I'll be treated with a French dinner with two of my good friends. We'll be dining at a private kitchen. If it's good, I'll take bb there.

It's strange. Someone crossed me today. Today's daily scripture is Matthew 18:21-35, in which it recorded that Jesus asked us to forgive others seventy times seven. When I read it, I thought - what co-incidence!

Attended Sunday church and had a discussion with those members. We agreed to have a schedule to visit my teacher.

Then went to St. Francis of Assisi for the second pre-baptism ceremony. It's about 2 to 3 times bigger than St. Teresa's and it's very nice. Because it's so big, when everyone sang the hymns, it sounded beautiful !

It's purely a ceremony as suppose to a mass as there was no breaking of bread (of course, most of us are not Catholics yet). In the middle of the ceremony, I cried. I don't know why, the tears just came. I was touched; moved. For what? I don't know. I was sitting between mum and my Godfather. Mum noticed it a bit later but didn't say anything. Don't know about my Godfather.

The Catholics-to-be from different church then had a photo taken with Bishop Zen. Godfather left before then as he has another engagement.

Mum and I then went to my family's favourite restaurant for dinner, celebrating for my birthday in advance. Yes, it's about 2/3 weeks in advance - we are all busy people. bb and sister catherine came too - What privilege!

Sister gave me a birthday card and present. It's a book relating to Mary Mother and the card has wonderful words on it. Sister is so nice. Bless her!

Stayed with bb last night. I planned to say a prayer then snuggle up, but I fell asleep in the middle of my prayer! Oops!

Went to work today. Not much to do lately. In fact, I have hardly any chargeable hours. Went home straight after that to put down the overnight stuff and had some lunch before going to pick up my teacher from her home. We took a taxi for a 3pm appointment with her doctor. Then we walked back to the chapel. We stopped in the interim for afternoon tea! Then I attended the anticipatory mass with her, followed by Way of the Cross. We went out for dinner together with other church friends. Dinner was nice. A lot of laughters. My teacher was very happy. It was getting late, around 10 pm and everyone wanted to go but my teacher is probably the only exception. I don't blame her. She's been house-bound for so long and it's the first meal she had outside for a few weeks, and there's so much laughter! When I go to her place, I tried to be as cheerful as I can and try to cheer her up as much as I can too. But there's a limit. It's been about 2 weeks of nearly everyday visit and taking care of my teacher. There had been quite a lot running around for her too. It's pretty tiring, I must say.

No, I'm not complaining. Just recording how I feel. At dinner, while my teacher was away to the washroom, I told the others that I have spoken to another church friend and she was going to say to all after tomorrow's service. I said we need some schedule among ourselves so that the work of taking care of my teacher could be shared among us, rather than just the few of us. I explained the situation and my teacher's condition. We need some short-term plan and a tentative medium term plan, as my teacher is considering getting back to work. She is not yet confident to walk to the tube station on her own, as there are steps and slopes. For the same reason, she needs someone to go home with her.

I told them for the last 2 weeks, things at work are ok and my boss had been away. Now he's back and things are picking up, I'm not sure if my working hours could be as regular as it has been.

The other thing is I'm sacrificing not only my time, but also those I spend with my family and bb. It's not them who needs me. It's the other way round. I need them.

It's also taxing on my work, in a way, as I'm so tired.

I suggested that we need someone on duty and perhaps someone as insurance in case the one on duty becomes unavailable at short notice for whatever reason.

Well, at least I have raised it. Let's see what they come up with.

I'm going to the usual 9:30am service. Attending mass on two consecutive days. wow!

Someone from St. Teresa's Church called in the afternoon. She said Father Lok liked the essay I wrote about how I come to follow Jesus and that they intended to post it on the church's website. She asked for a soft copy of the essay so that she doesn't have to re-type it again - it's three pages long! I sent it to her.

Told bb about it. She wasn't so comfortable as the essay is quite personal. Slow as I always am, I didn't think about it when I was asked. I guess I just thought if it helps to spread the good news even in the most remote way, that'll be ok. I have since read the essays by the others that have already been posted on that website. No name was mentioned. I said to bb in that case, only those know me would know the essay is from me (and I think that person would be bb, Father Lok plus the lady who called).

Sorry bb, for being slow. I'm however grateful and enjoying the protection and care from bb.

I'm so spoilt :)

I have been doing homeworks in preparation of my baptism this Easter. For each piece of homework, I have to read some text and answer a few "fill in the blanks" questions and a short question. One of those homeworks talks about the Sacrament of Marriage. The "fill in the blanks" questions are no problem - you will find the answers in the text so the objective is to make sure you have read and understood them.

The short question is this: "True love is the foundation of marriage. What is true love?" I quoted the answers from the text. I also quoted two passages from the bible - and I got those quotes from a recently-held wedding ceremony that I attended. I also quoted from the encyclical from Pope Benedict XVI entitled "God is Love", summarised and paraphrased in the recent issue of the Catholic weekly newspaper. I agree with everything that is said about true love in those documents. I handed in my homework and Father Lok said it looks ok.

That's all academic.

Recently, I have this experience: I have been busy with the church's activities and with all preparations and ceremonies before my baptism. That means I have very little time for bb. She didn't complain at all but rather, she is extremely understanding and supportive. Once, she even took the trouble to take me to St. Teresa's Church by bus to make sure I know the way, and she left whilst I attended the first pre-baptism ceremony. I didn't see her again that evening as I had dinner with my parents and Godfather who also attended the ceremony. She also said she would attend the baptism ceremony in April 2006.

My head has been spinning since I know I would be baptised this April. It has gone a little worse this week while I am searching for God's plan for me. When I was young, I wanted to join a convent. The idea came back recently, although (as I said in my earliest post), I am afraid that I would be the Maria in The Sound of Music and cause trouble to whichever convent that accepts me. From then onwards, as my younger brother would say, there would be "a serious of unfortunate events!"

I know how much bb wants us to be together. Yet bb has suggested we should stay as very close friends to avoid getting in the way to God's plan for me. There was no queue. The suggestion originated from her. As the suggestion sinks in, I got more shocked and have mixed feelings about it. It is something that I have not thought of. What shocks me most is bb's love - so thoughful, considerate, unselfish, sacrificial, caring and putting her priority to the last. As I said, I don't know what I have done to deserve that. In fact, I don't think I deserve that.

One thing is clear: bb has put "true love" into practice. Something I have a long way to learn.

Got up early. Put on the new clothes bb bought me from India - a t-shirt and a pashimina - not too thick, just right for today:) - then went to collect my teacher from home with that other yound lady. When I got there, my teacher was having breakfast - she has diabetics and forgot to have her pills today, and when she remembered, she had to have breakfast.

We took a taxi together and got to CC at around 9:15am.

After mass and rosary prayer, I meant to take my teacher home then return to CC for bible sharing. But my teacher had to give orders to others - who does what - and remind this and other persons, we didn't leave CC until 12:30pm. When we got to her place, I had to check her fridge to see what groceries she needs. I even cooked soup for her - potatos, tomatoes and pork. Of course, then she has to make sure the soup doesn't get burnt. Then I took an express bus and got back to CC by around 2pm. The others have lunch, like any other days before bible sharing. They had dim sum. I was hoping someone would ask if I need anything then they would get a doggy bag for me. None, sadly. When I called one of the members just after I left my teacher's flat, that member asked if she could get me something to eat. I thought, "Ah, so someone does care." So I asked where they are. She said they already finished. Then I thought no point. And I said I'll get a cake at a bakery close by. I also bought a bottle of drinks. That's my lunch.

Bible sharing was followed by choir practice. That ended around 4pm. Then I attended "an interview" for CC's monthly newsletter. I did it ever so reluctantly. I don't want any publicity. In the end, what happened was we (the interviewers and I) chatted. Some questions I decline to answer. A lot of them was about my family. I just told them how many siblings I have. I was afraid they would dig deeper. I know it's a fact and I don't want to lie, but I really do not know if I could bring myself to talk about my family's loss. Neither do I want to tell them I had a sad and somewhat withdrawn childhood. bb knows all these.

We finished at aroun 6pm. I went to my parents' place. Unfortunately, I mixed up their flight time with their arrival time, so I was too early. Since I have such a headache, I bought a few Korean DVDs for CC in London and went home.

I think I'm simply tired. I feel very tired. The young lady who went to CC with my teacher and I this morning had her eyes closed from time to time during our practice choir. And I had to attend a further "interview."

I've been thinking what bb says in her other post. What are we in the eyes of God? Today it seems that I'm doing all these good deeds trying to compensate for something that may displease our God, but which I'm helpless to change and may even want it to last as long as it can.

Last night, bb said she would support mm to be a sister. mm is touched. At this stage, mm is still searching for God's plan for her.

Left work around 6-ish. Called my teacher to see if she needed any grocery. Got them and got to her flat at around 7pm. Another Father and her other friends from Dominican visited her. Father blessed her flat and her. They chatted whilst I stayed quiet. They got on very well. They jokes and laughed too. The atmostphere was good.

Then I cooked dinner for both of us and prepared food for her for tomorrow. In terms of ingredients, she only has salt. She has sugar too but as she's a little diabetic, I didn't dare to put too much in. Cooked mince pork and pumpkin with rice. We both thought it was a bit too salty. She uses a different type of salt. I'll try again next time.

Then she called one of the members of Sunday church to come to her flat. That lady is studying a technical college. My teacher told me before that she's not happy because her father and brother would beat her if they are unhappy. Her mum doesn't trust her either, even where there's a witness supporting her story. It's sad to hear that. I'm a lucky girl. Although I was unhappy and pretty withdrawn when I was young, I have been well looked after and well rewarded by our Father in heaven. Those experience sometimes still haunts me and they made me sad and feeling unwanted. When they do, I would try to focus on what I have now and those experience were there to make me feel for others. They got me prepared for what I could do now - that I could understand a bit more about people's unfortunate experience and comfort them the best I could. They have also made me more considerate.

Recently, people say I'm optimistic. Like one of the secretaries in office, she said once a very sad person see me, they will be happy; they would see me as the source of happiness. My teacher recently called me "Laughing lady !" When I see her sick, I try to make her laugh to ease hoping to ease some of her loneiness and sadness (for being sick). I think people see me always wearing a smiling face. Many a time I feel very sad, and yet I don't know why, when I meet them, I would smile. May be I was trying to enjoy the time, or may be I want to forget the unhappy event for a moment, or simply just want to hide my true feelings inside as I don't want people to worry about me. Only bb sees my unhappiness. She always hears me whining. :P

My teacher wanted to attend Sunday morning's mass. She said she wanted to do so and also she misses us. We agreed that the young lady mentioned above and I will go to pick her up at around 8am on Sunday morning and we'll go by taxi. We should be there by 9am and mass starts at 9:30am. My teacher is of old age and sometimes, I fear of the days available so I try to make time for her request. But that means sacrificing bbmm time and my own time. For example, we (my teacher, that young lady and I) chatted until late last night. By the time I got home, it's nearly 12 midnight.

This could otherwise be a bbmm evening (bb just got back from India).

Left work around 6-ish. Called my teacher to see if she needed any grocery. Got them and got to her flat at around 7pm. Another Father and her other friends from Dominican visited her. Father blessed her flat and her. They chatted whilst I stayed quiet. They got on very well. They jokes and laughed too. The atmostphere was good.

Then I cooked dinner for both of us and prepared food for her for tomorrow. In terms of ingredients, she only has salt. She has sugar too but as she's a little diabetic, I didn't dare to put too much in. Cooked mince pork and pumpkin with rice. We both thought it was a bit too salty. She uses a different type of salt. I'll try again next time.

Then she called one of the members of Sunday church to come to her flat. That lady is studying a technical college. My teacher told me before that she's not happy because her father and brother would beat her if they are unhappy. Her mum doesn't trust her either, even where there's a witness supporting her story. It's sad to hear that. I'm a lucky girl. Although I was unhappy and pretty withdrawn when I was young, I have been well looked after and well rewarded by our Father in heaven. Those experience sometimes still haunts me and they made me sad and feeling unwanted. When they do, I would try to focus on what I have now and those experience were there to make me feel for others. They got me prepared for what I could do now - that I could understand a bit more about people's unfortunate experience and comfort them the best I could. They have also made me more considerate.

Recently, people say I'm optimistic. Like one of the secretaries in office, she said once a very sad person see me, they will be happy; they would see me as the source of happiness. My teacher recently called me "Laughing lady !" When I see her sick, I try to make her laugh to ease hoping to ease some of her loneiness and sadness (for being sick). I think people see me always wearing a smiling face. Many a time I feel very sad, and yet I don't know why, when I meet them, I would smile. May be I was trying to enjoy the time, or may be I want to forget the unhappy event for a moment, or simply just want to hide my true feelings inside as I don't want people to worry about me. Only bb sees my unhappiness. She always hears me whining. :P

My teacher wanted to attend Sunday morning's mass. She said she wanted to do so and also she misses us. We agreed that the young lady mentioned above and I will go to pick her up at around 8am on Sunday morning and we'll go by taxi. We should be there by 9am and mass starts at 9:30am. My teacher is of old age and sometimes, I fear of the days available so I try to make time for her request. But that means sacrificing bbmm time and my own time. For example, we (my teacher, that young lady and I) chatted until late last night. By the time I got home, it's nearly 12 midnight.

This could otherwise be a bbmm evening (bb just got back from India).

Visited my teacher at Queen Mary hospital yesterday and today. Went with a Church friend yesterday and by myself today. Then I bumped into two other Church friends. My teacher has been telling us who and who has been. She said it so proudly and with a very nice smile on her face. I told you, she's well loved.

She'll be discharged from hospital tomorrow. Didn't manage to visit her on Tuesday as I had to wait for the stupid partner to come back and settle the draft letters which really only took him 5 minutes. And for that 5 minutes, I had to wait from around 6pm to after 9:30pm. Oh dear!

My teacher is well, generally cheerful, probably because she feels the love around her. I'm happy to see her all times. Like today, I worked hard to finish everything early and got lucky because I managed to catch that stupid partner before he went to attend a meeting at 5:45pm. I left by around 6:30pm, got to my teacher by around 7pm and stayed until around 8:45pm 9pm-ish. I could have stayed a little longer but well, guess the others and she too has to rest. Can't be so selfish lah. Putting self happiness onto others pain :P

My teacher said Father Russell went home today. Hope he'll be well soon. He's probably not going to attend the mass on Sunday. So, I may meet another Father.

My teacher wants to attend the Church on Sunday. She needs someone to go with her. I asked what time she leaves home. She said around 8am/8:15am. I said if her condition is ok, I'll try to take her. I said I'll give her a call on Saturday. Hope bb doesn't mind.

My stupid boss would be away next week. May be I could see if I can stay with bb during the week as consolation?

Now that all letter and article have been done. Should get back to my homework now. I have an idea what to write for the next one. The one after that would be marriage and the question for thought is "Marriage is based on true love. What is "true love"?" Oh lah lah!

Travelled on MTR with our conductor. Had a good chat with him. Quite enjoyed that. I was saying to the Church friend yesterday - It's kind of funny. I know the Church friends, but only say "hello," "bye" and "peace be with you." Ah yes, had dinner with this Church friend last night. bb, she's the one with the name beginning with the alphabet "y".

My parents are now in Bangkok. They bought a package. It's the first time they went on their own not joining a tour, except when they go to the "old village." I'm pretty worried. Guess what? mum sent me a sms after they arrived! Impressive, isn't it?!!

I'm tired and have a headache, but I'm happy and my heart is full of love. :)

What's bb doing now??

Met with a Bedford High girl for lunch today. Told her that I wanted to become a sister when I was young. I've been considering that for the last day or two since I read bb's post re God's plan for me. Two issues: I think my family needs me, and if I do, I wouldn't be surprised if I were a bit like Maria in The Sound of Music - troublemaker but then the sisters adore her because she's adorable - ha ha ha!!!

This Bedford High girl is going to Kenya this August. We have been already, haven't we, bb?

Finished the article that Father Lok asked me to prepare and sent it to him. It's about what it feels to be a Catholic-to-be. It's a little too long. I read somewhere that it should be around 400 words, but I think I must have written over 1200! I tried cutting it down, I really did and my secretary (who did the typing for me) wanted to kill me, I'm sure! In the end, I asked Father Lok's help in my covering email - talking about passing the buck! :P

I'm a bit of a fan of Father Lok now. He's really very nice and gentle and smooth. I've completed about half of the homework that he asked me to do now, prepared "a letter" of why I want to be baptised, plus this article that may be published in the local Catholic newspaper. He's been saying my works are good - yeah! No adverse comments from him so far - touch wood. And he's always so encouraging. It's great to read his posts, although they are short, but you still feel his love and warmth, and that he cares.

My teacher and Father Russell are both unwell. Father Russell speaks at Sunday services that I attend. My teacher has a badly swollen knee. She was in a lot of pain the evening before and couldn't sleep. I went to see her after work last night and her right knee was twice the size of her left knee. Oh dear! One of the members at Sunday church took her to see doctor today. The latest I heard is that she has been admitted to St. Mary's Hospital for closer observation. Seems that her bones are getting old and some tissues were infected.

My teacher told me about Father Russell when I visited her last night. He collapsed during a mass last Sunday (5th) and was rushed to the hospital. I was shocked. Lucky the church was next to the hospital (St. Paul's) so they didn't need to wait for the ambulance. I was told that he has a heart problem and had an operation a few years ago. He too is close to 80 years old - wow! I paid a visit to him at the hospital during lunch today. It was great to chat to him in an informal environment. I hardly had a chance to speak to him. I only see him during Sunday services and he usually has to rush to St. Paul's for the mass at 11:15am. I succeeded in putting a smile on his face and on a few occasions, made him laugh! hee hee.

I only hope that they both get well soon.

I posted a note about my teacher and Father Russell at CC Forum. I guess since then, the member who took my teacher to see the doctor today must have been bombarded with calls from people like myself. Oops. I should be more considerate and exercise a bit more discretion next time. But then I thought if I were the others, I'd like to know too as my teacher is well loved. My post only asked them to remember her and Father Russell in their prayers and perhaps to give them a call when they have a moment. I just thought human are at their weakest when they are unwell, and particularly for those who have given up their lives and families to God.

I love Father Russell too. I didn't quite realise it until I was shocked to hear the news about him yesterday. Guess it's an example of how careless, slow and stupid I am, not realising or recognising those I love. I guess I'm just blind.

Completed my first ceremony to become a Catholic this evening. There are 3 formal ceremonies together, including baptism itself, and my Godfather has to attend each of them for me. I'm really happy and feel privileged that my beloved Uncle Clement is my Godfather. He was baptised just over half a centary ago and he was saying that his baptism certificate itself is an antique! :D

The ceremony was subsumed into a mass. It took a bit longer than a mass, around one and a half hour. There are over 140 to be baptised this year. This evening, each of us has to hand in a letter to Father describing how we get to know God and why we wish to be baptised. The purpose of today's ceremony is that we would be formally admitted to be persons to be baptised this year.

My parents attended the ceremony too. Dad came back especially for that. How nice of him. Mum gave up her mahjong this evening, so it's very nice of her too.

Godfather has to re-schedule some of his appointments to make way for the 3 ceremonies. Bless him!

I said to bb today: when I knew there were 3 ceremonies plus homework, plus retreat and so on, I did think why so troublesome. Then I thought, it's a test of our sincerity to follow God. Also, at each stage, there's always the chance of reflecting and asking ourselves as to whether it's something we want to do. I also think it paves the way for me to be a Godmother for someone else in future. I'm benefiting from others' generosity now. I'll extend the same generosity towards others if I'm asked and when I'm fit to be a Godmother. :)

Father Lok is happy with the homeworks I did so far. He has asked me to write an article about how I feel to be baptised. As I said to bb, I deliberately left something out of my letter to Father that I handed in this evening, saving them for the article. It's not so much of writing or need to find time to write it, it's the content that I'm scratching my head. I saved something to write about, but I need to think about how to write it. Just checked my work email. Father Lok has already written back and re the 5 homeworks I sent him at lunch today. So efficient - wow! Then he chased me for the draft article. God help me!

Just like other mass, Catholics could receive Holy Communion. My Godfather didn't. He said he hasn't done confession. I said, "wow, such good guy!" That's one reason why I like him so much. He's so proper. :)

We then took a taxi and went to a restaurant close to where my parents live and have dinner together. It went well. Only that sometimes Dad asked a few too obvious/commercial questions - eg where did Uncle find his clients and so on. Slightly embarrassing, but I know he meant well. I suppose it's even more embarassing for him, but he did it for me.

Went shopping/walked around with bb in the afternoon. She bought some snacks for her colleagues in India where she's going tomorrow for a week. Showed bb my letter to Father before the ceremony. She said it's good; it flowed well. I'm happy :)

bb asked me to write it here. I'll start tomorrow. A bit tired now. Still recovering from my cold and early rise tomorrow for Church. So I'll go to bed early, after the laundry is done.

Watch this space.

It's been almost another week since I wrote here. Let's start on Sunday, being the first day of the week. Went to usual Sunday service then back in office to do some work. I did for about 2 and a half hours' work then went clothes shopping at my usual boutique. Bought a few items but paid quite a bit. Oops. Then rushed home to tidy up for my old friends' arrival. The are both married, one with a boy and currently pregnant. As such, her husband didn't feel comfortable to let her come on her own, so he and their son came too. But we wanted a ladies-only little reunion. The other friend and I were saying, "why would he wanna join???" But I'm glad my friend has married well, and her husband treasures her. I'm happy for her.

Monday to today. Work. quite busy. I got some feedback from Father Lok on the first module of my homework. He said I did them pretty well especially the part re what I think about each "lesson." Then he asked me to write an article for the Weekly Catholic Newspaper. He used to be its editor. I was thrilled. You see, it's got to be in Chinese and it's quite a pain to do the homeworks in Chinese, which is of low standard. Someone appreciates them - what a surprise! May be no one contributes to the paper??! :P

Not feeling well today. In fact, not well since last weekend. I think I caught a flu. Had sore throat since last weekend. It's gone very bad and today, I've been stuffing myself with sweets for sore throat. Then I sneezed quite a bit in Court (yeah, went before the Court of Appeal today) and blew my nose. Just feeling a little drained and tired. May be it's because of deadline.

bb has called me a few time this week. :)

Weekend is gonna be busy. Tomorrow bb and I are attending a buffet dinner with my family. Sat am is work then I have my first baptism ceremony in early evening. Yeah, pretty excited. I need to write about how I come to follow Him by then. I did a first draft last Saturday, but am still working on it. Sunday will start with usual service. Hopefully it'll be a rest day for the rest of the day.

I did this test too. Result as follows.

****************************************************

You chose CX - your Enneagram type is TWO.

"I must help others"

Helpers are warm, concerned, nurturing, and sensitive to other people's needs.

How to Get Along with Me

* Tell me that you appreciate me. Be specific.
* Share fun times with me.
* Take an interest in my problems, though I will probably try to focus on yours.
* Let me know that I am important and special to you.
* Be gentle if you decide to criticize me.

In Intimate Relationships
* Reassure me that I am intersting to you.
* Reassure me often that you love me.
* Tell me I'm attractive and that you're glad to be seen with me.

What I Like About Being a Two

* being able to relate easily to people and to make friends
* knowing what people need and being able to make their lives better
* being generous, caring, and warm
* being sensitive to and perceptive about others' feelings
* being enthusiastic and fun-loving, and having a good sense of humor

What's Hard About Being a Two

* not being able to say no
* having low self-esteem
* feeling drained from overdoing for others
* not doing things I really like to do for myself for fear of being selfish
* criticizing myself for not feeling as loving as I think I should
* being upset that others don't tune in to me as much as I tume in to them
* working so hard to be tactful and considerate that I suppress my real feelings

Twos as Children Often

* are very sensitive to disapproval and criticism
* try hard to please their parents by being helpful and understanding
* are outwardly compliant
* are popular or try to be popular with other children
* act coy, precocious, or dramatic in order to get attention
* are clowns and jokers (the more extroverted Twos), or quiet and shy (the more introverted Twos)

Twos as Parents

* are good listeners, love their children unconditionally, and are warm and encouraging (or suffer guilt if they aren't)
* are often playful with their children
* wonder: "Am I doing it right?" "Am I giving enough?" "Have I caused irreparable damage?"
* can become fiercely protective

It's been some time since bb write any post. I don't see her often these day, mainly it's because I'm busy with the duties/activities in Church. It's my fault not spending enough time with her. I wonder what's on her mind, what has she been doing, is she happy?

I had a busy weekend. Met with an old A-level schoolmate for dinner on Friday, went to work on Sat morning, then went massage with bb, followed by din din. We had steamed fish, veg and a seafood (don't know what it's called). The fish was not as good as I expected. As always, it's the company that counts. :)

Today, went to the usual Sunday service after which my teacher told other members of the service team that I'm getting baptised this Easter. Chatted a little while with the conductor and a few other members. One of them was going to be a Godmother for her friend, but at another church. I moaned and joked about having quite a lot of homework to do, and asked if anyone would be interested in doing it for me. I was naughty. hee hee. My teacher was serious. She said if I have any difficulty in those homework, we can always discuss them at our lessons. Oops. I didn't mean to worry her. It's true that I feel pressure with those work though.

The conductor lent me a CD which also has the version of Ave Maria we learnt last week. I listened to it plus other Chants Sacres. They are beautiful. I've downloaded all of them onto my library, then my ipod. I can listen to it while travelling. :)

Then Mum joined me to attend a talk at St. Teresa's Church. She was away but came back specifically to join me for that talk, to keep me company. How very nice of her! We were both tired. She dosed off soon after the talk started. I persisted for the first hour. Just when I thought there was a break, Father To continued with the talk. I really was fighting against my sleepyness for the last half hour or so. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

I introduced Father Lok to mum.

My teacher asked other members to attend, if they can. As expected, the room was silent. What I didn't expect is that there was no congratulations from other people. It didn't cost them anything. Or may be they see it as nothing new. I understand that. I would only say that they take these matters for granted, sadly. I consider a gift of God. I still remember vividly that on my way to meet Father for the first time, I took the tube then a cab and in that cab, I prayed to God to welcome me to His family. My prayer has again been answered favourably. Lucky!

I notice that I'm becoming more and more human each day. I'm not as dedicated to my work as I was before. I want my time to count for something. May be I'm just not so interested in what I'm doing. Since I know I'll join the big Family this year, I've been thinking how much I want my sis to be there. Only if.

Met with an o-level schoolmate tonight, who just returned from US. It's the first time I met her son. So tall - wow. Time really flies. I haven't seen her for a good few years. She's now 5/6 months pregnant - another boy. :D

Called my teacher early in the morning to report on yesterday's interview with Father. She was happy for me and has kindly agreed to get the "distance learning" materials for me. I'm spoilt. :)

Had dim sum lunch with my parents and elder brother. He and his family has just returned from holiday in Europe. I was thrilled to see them, and was eager to spread the good news to them. Dad said I looked very happy. Yes, I was, and still am. :D

Dropped an email to the conductor to share the good news. Why him? Because my teacher has told him about it. If my skin is thick enough, I would have posted this good news on the service team's website and share the joy with others. I bumped into another member of service team. I was so happy that I hugged her and told her the good news.

Called sis (my ex-teacher) and told her the good news. She was very happy for me.

I also called my ex-secretary and shared the good news with her. She has agreed to be my Godmother if I couldn't get someone else.

bb of course couldn't escape the fate of listening to all my babbles. hee hee.

This is a very special Valentine's Day to me - that I would have the love of God. Something I believe will change me.

bb and I went out for dinner. We had a Japanese restaurant in mind but when we got there, it was packed and there was a queue waiting outside it. We went to a local tea house that serves portugese food. Food was nice. I enjoyed it. It's not expensive, but it's not the cost that counts. It's the company that matters.

Because it's Valentine's Day, even sf called me. We wished each other a Happy Valentine's Day.

I feel very special and privileged today. Feel so much love around me. I'm a lucky girl. :)

Because my brain was stuffed with so much love, I couldn't concentrate and didn't do any work today. Oops. Will try to get in earlier tomorrow to deal with them. The idiot boss bought each of us a box of heart-shaped chocolate from Cova and a small card, wishing us a Happy Valentine's Day. What's wrong with him??!

Didn't get home until late. Finished work around 7pm, but stayed in the office to prepare for my interview with Fr. Lok. I was just discussing forthcoming schedule with my teacher yesterday, and called Fr. Lok yesterday morning, expecting to fix a meeting with him at least one week after. He suggested yesterday evening. I was taken totally by surprise. May be age is getting to me. These days, I like everything planned and would feel thrown out of balance if anything sudden happens. Like this one.

I was about 5/10 minutes late for the meeting. Partly because I was so preoccupied in my thoughts that I took the tube the wrong direction, then I got off a station too early! Bizarre!

The meeting ended at around 10:10pm. The first question was what do I think of baptism. I told him it's something I've wanted to do for a long time and I'd be a wish come true to be able to join this big family. Then he asked about my families, education, work, what has sis catherine and my teacher taught me so far and what I've been doing (e.g. attending Sunday services and "sharing", chapel choir). Later, he explained what's baptism. It's probably the answer he was expecting from me. I knew that already but it didn't come out as such. I wasn't calm enough.

It got better as the meeting went on. We chatted and shared about one of the duties of a Catholic - to preach the good words and spread the good news of God. He said he was now approaching it from a commercial angle. For example, a service team opened an ice-cream palour whilst spreading the good news. He even gave me a 20% discount card! hee hee.

Fr. Lok gave me a timetable of the various ceremonies I need to attend to get baptised. The big day is on 15 April 2006. He said he trusted my teacher. If she said someone is ready to be baptised, he would believe her. Hmmmm ...

I called my mum and bb afterwards, reporting on the meeting. By the time I had something to eat, bathed and checked my mail, it's already close to 1am.

Strange enough, I woke up early this morning, even before the alarm went off. 7-ish or even before that. My heart was beating hard. I couldn't go back to sleep. Something's up? It's Valentine's Day??! :D

Feel a little guilty. It's the weekend before Valentine and yet, I didn't spend much time with bb today. Attended regular Sunday service, had lunch with the church's service team, then attended "Sharing" and had choir practice. By the time I finished, it's already close to 5pm. I'd like to meet with bb, but it'd be unfair to her - just coming out for a short while for dinner, as we both have to go to work tomorrow. I wish there's more time and we can spend more time together. I suppose we could do so when we retire. But sometimes I think if we spend too long together, we may end up fighting. So confusing.

Although I did some homework before attending today's Sharing, I still learnt a lot by listening to other people's thoughts of this morning's bible reading. I didn't say anything. Only shared some of my thoughts whilst walking my teacher home. She lives very near me.

Learnt a new song today - Ave Maria (4th one down the list of the link "Classical Avelsia". There was Latin and English version. The choir opted for English except me. My teacher opted for Latin so we learnt it in Latin. So, I get what I want. hee hee. I always like hymns in Latin, although I don't necessarily understand them, but the sound is usually more solemn and grand. The hymn obviously praises Mary. The music is gentle and loving, which is reflective of Mary. The music is beautiful. Imagine that hymn being sung in a church or cathedral. It's difficult to learn and to sing well. There are so many high notes and the rhythm is pretty tricky. When our conducting saw I was bringing back my looseleaf hymn book, he asked why. I said I need to re-arrange some of them and wanted to do some practice. He said I was picking them up quite well. I spent half an hour in the music room in this building tonight, just to have a quick run through the songs I learnt today, in particular, Ave Maria. :D

I found the above link when I was trying to download songs onto my ipod. I was going to post it in the service team forum, but didn't in the end. I didn't want them to think I've nothing to do, and cling on them. It's just I'm a warm person. I didn't want them to get the wrong idea.

We (my teacher, our conductor, another church-goer and I) took the tube together. My teacher told them about me, that I'll be meeting with Father soon. I'll be calling Father tomorrow to arrange for a meeting. Must concentrate and speed up on my revision. What if Father say I'm not up to it. My standard is so low??! Ai ya! Don't want to lose face - my face and my teacher's!

The pressure is surely there and is building up.

Both of my best friends are coming back this month! yeah! One of them is in London and the other West coast, and I'm in the middle. We know each other from 3rd or 4th year in school. They now have their own family. That makes it very difficult for us to meet up. We keep in touch via emails. I knew one was coming back since last month and I'm thrilled already. Yesterday I got an email from the other and she's gonna be back during the same period ! What more can I ask?! That's a coincidence too. They didn't plan to come back together. In fact the one I heard from yesterday wasn't gonna come back at all. She planned to go to NY with her hubby. She obviously chose us. Good choice, I think. hee hee.

We have a social committee in this firm. It organises social events for fee earners on a quarterly basis and the firm subsidise those event. Got an email from them in which we are to state our preferences. Here are the new stuff that I find very interesting:

Virtual Car Racing
A day on the Spirit of Outward Bound (training onboard a 67ft yacht)

None of these are cheap lah, but I think they would be quite fun. :)

I'm also interested in Bowling. Movie night sounds alright too.

May be bb would like to try some of these too? May be as her b'day present this year?

Of the several promises I made for yesterday, I didn't make any of them. I didn't go to Yoga and did not do much work. One thing I said I'd do, and I did this morning, is to go to the Church for early service. It started at 7:15am and I was late. It was cold and dark. Although the alarm clock had gone off a few times with the snooze function, I got up late. I left home about 7:15am. Knowing that I was late, I wanted to catch the readings and the teaching. By the time I got there, Father was already breaking the bread for Holy Communion. Oops. I stayed until the end. Didn't take Holy Communion. Not only am I not yet a Catholic, but also I was only there to witness the breaking of the bread and so on. I wouldn't have felt worthy for it.

The service ended at around 7:45am. A very short service. Even shorter than that offered at St. Jude. I stayed back, took out my copy of the bible and read a bit of it. Somehow I've book-marked the passage I have read yesterday and perhaps also on the day before. It's Mark . I must have read it a few times, plus the explanation available on a website. And yet, I didn't quite get what it's trying to say. So, I read that passage again. Still I was too dumb to understand those words. It's strange. There was not a word I don't of, but put together, the teaching simply escaped me. I stopped and prayed to God that I may understand what He's trying to say. I read it again, took the time to think about it, and its meaning dawned to me! Yes, just like that. I thanked God for that. Or may be I was rushing and didn't use my brain at all. Oops. :P

It's the first time I visit this Church. It has stationery with their own design and drawigns for sale Those drawings are very nice and pretty. I wanted to get the memo pad, stickers and keyrings with angels on them, but I didn't know where the stationery shop was. In any event, I guess it would have been too early, that it's probably not opened yet. I wanted to get the stickers and keyring for the little girl I recently met at Church. May be next time.

I looked around and read a few leaflets. I picked up a pocket-sized card that talks about Penance - the procedure and what would be said then. I also picked up a leaflet for donation to hospital pastoral care. The leaflet also invites people to volunteer their service for it. I wanted to go. But there's so much I need to do now. To start with, I better get more revision done and know more about God's words. Then I want to spend more time with bb and my parents and family. It's a good thing to want to help the others but I should not forget those around me too. So I'll wait to see first.

PS The idiot (my boss) has just come in and found me doing this! Oops. Better get on with some work.

The answer is surfing and chatting, on the phone and with my ex-temp secretary. Yes, she's back for one day, working for a newly joined colleague. She's very nice. Honestly, I like her better than my own secretary. She works harder and is more motivated than my secretary. My secretary is smarter than the temp secretary. She knows better when to do things, what to do and how. Talking about doing the right things, at the right place, at the right time.

I did some work. Not much though. I was bored out of my mind. Not interested at the kind of work I do now. I'm just getting on with things. Not as motivated as I was before. The work just doesn't interest me anymore. A colleague next door said he wanted to move to another firm, and named a few. I already know those firms are recruiting, but I'm too senior (or senile) for them. I wish I could move on and soon.

I haven't prayed for that. I must trust the plan God put in place for me. Sometimes when I think about it, this experience has made me seen things that I didn't see before. One important thing is how I'm loved by those around me. Now on my way to work everyday, I would look up the sky, humming my favourite hymns, and grateful to all the gifts God has given me. I count myself lucky. If everything were going too well in the office, I would miss those things and take them for granted, a bit like what I was before. Sometimes I blame myself for that. That had wasted a lot of my time and have very much suppressed the human side of me such that I didn't spend as much time with my sis as I would like to. I have learnt to stop/ slow down a little and treasure all the gifts I have been given, and to spend time with my loved ones.

The link is bb's post was really cool. But I had to try and try many times before I see what I'm suppose to see! In the middle of it, I called bb and had a great laugh at myself for having a very different and weird mind! :D

Told sf today that once I am baptised, I'd be making affidavits, not affirmations. He went "Big Time!" :D

Took a sick leave today. No, I'm not ill. Just felt very drained and needed a day's rest. I struggled hard whether I should take leave or not. The physical side of me was enthusiastic as I really some rest. That would help my emotions too. But the other side of me thought it's wrong, and that I'll be lying, which is forbidden by God. Eventually, I gave in and left messages with the office saying I won't be there today. I said to myself that I'll use today to seriously read and learn more about Christianity and God's word.

The result is yes, I did some of that. And reflected upon those words. What I wanted to do but didn't do was to do some revision before my baptism.

I looked up websites of the Churches and read a bit more about them. I learnt that the Church near where I live offers masses at 7:15am on weekdays. I wanted to go, to strengthen my faith and my confidence to be a good Christian, but even now, the flesh is weak. I'm already doubting if I'd get up at that time, and if I go to the office after that, I'll be early and what do I do then, and so on. Many excuses.

I promise myself this: I'll go on the day after. I'll start some revision now before going to bed. I'm free tomorrow lunch and I'll go to CC chapel. I'll also see if I can fit in a yoga class tomorrow after work. That's my plan.

I've been asking myself the same question: Why do I go to Church now?

Of course, I am just responding to His command. That is a privilege. I have been asking myself if I do so as a copycat, copying what my sis did. She was a Catholic, so I want to be one too.

I formally started going to doctrine lessons after she has gone. I didn't want that copycat reason to be true because it would shake the flimsy foundation of faith I have, and the heat will wear off very quickly.

It has just occurred to me that I am answering to God. I mean it's something I've always wanted to do - to be one of His child - but somehow since I left convent school at about 16/17, I have put him behind me. From time to time, I was invited to go to religious groups but none of them is Catholic. They are usually Church of England, which is different.

I have recently read Five People You Meet in Heaven. I think one reason of my sister has moved on, or should I say the effect of that, is the other side of me has been awakened, or reminded, of. When my sis was seriously ill, I prayed to God on her bedside that she may be gone to Her Father in Heaven soon when her suffering will end and she will enjoy eternal peace and happiness. Of course, I also asked that she be well again, but the realistic side of me felt that may not be possible, no matter how many lies I tell to comfort myself and my family. I also asked Him to let the sufferings be on me, and not on her. I would say the usual prayers - Our Father, Hail Mary, Glory be to the Father - and usually ended my prayers by saying what Jesus said to Our Father when he was praying in the garden before he was taken away and later, crucified - please take that cup of suffering from me, but let it be God's will and not mine.

My sis has moved on. I hope she's now with Our Father, enjoying eternal peace and happiness. I had also asked for His Love on members of my family, in particular, my parents. I consider the pain of your child's departure is great and I still ask God to keep an eye on them, to comfort them. As time goes by, in a way, they seem to accept my sis's departure better than me.

I have always felt that my prayers have been answered. It is my turn to repay Him, to repay His love to me - that he answered my prayers notwithstanding I was, and still am, a pagan.

Now I shall be baptised soon, this Easter or later this year. I take this very seriously. I am thrilled but on the other hand, I'm not confident that I'll ever be as good a Christian He wants me to be, but I'll try. I'll try hard. I don't know what I can contribute to the Church. I hope and pray that when He shows me what He wants me to do, I will hear and answer with all my heart and willingly accepts them. I hope I have the intelligence and diligence for them.

Deep inside, I very much hope my sis could share the joy of that important day and event with me when it comes, that she could be there and witness to all there is to happen. That, I think, would be too much to ask.

It has also occurred to me today that after I have been baptised, I'll be making affidavits, not affirmations anymore.

Got up early and attended Sunday church. When my teacher asked me to go, I thought it'd be rather difficult as it means getting up early - the service starts at 9:30am and I need to be there by 9am for choir practice.

I started around Nov 2005. It's been a few months. It's not so painful. It's pretty addictive. It's becoming like a habit. I feel like I'm a parasite growing and feeding on it. I feel more relaxed, confident, calmer and happier when I'm there and afterwards. The effect wears off as the days go by and I try to hang on to it by singing hymns I like. Sometimes, I'd look forward to Sunday so that I can take my dose. I find it a very good cure for the unhappyness I experience, mainly in the office. I hope I have the faith and privilege to continue needing this cure and be able to feed on it.

Next Sunday, we'll have bible sharing after Sunday service plus choir practice. On the one hand, I look forward to it (I've attended the one held in January 2006 and enjoyed it). On the other hand, I feel guilty for not spending the time with bb.

After service today, went back to office and worked a bit more. Discussed what needs to be done with colleague and trainee. Left around 3:30pm for massage. I had foot massage while bb had body massage. She had back complaint. Hope she's feeling better now.

We were going to have hot pot, at a restaurant where my parents live. bb agreed to ask my parents to join so I called mum. Mum made a call to the restaurant trying to make a reservation but was told that the food was not fresh. Dinner would be ok. When we were there, we agreed that the restaurant lied. It wanted to make more money and therefore told us that the hot pot stuff were no good. You see, hot pot was asking for a fixed price and eat-all-you-can, whereas dinner is a la carte. Wicked. bb really wanted to have hot pot. I promised to take her somewhere we had been before and we both enjoyed. :)

I've been trying very hard to remember what I did on Friday evening (It's now Sunday evening, 5th Feb 2006). Since I can't remember that, I'll cheat - look at my diary.

Ah yes, I had din din with my family. My parents have come back from their mini holiday. And I got my lai sees from them :)

The idiot is back. Gave me a liasee - $100. You might say no surprise, but that's already an improvement from him. What did we get last year - $20? $50?

met up with sf. First time we said we'll meet in advance and we did. I haven't seen him for quite some time. It's very good to see him again. We had our usual hot chocolate, and chatted. I gave him his ipod nano, and showed him what to do to charge up the machine. We agreed that I'll go to his chamber to fix it for him and teach him this Saturday afternoon. Fingers-cross for mm. May be mm can call bb if she needs help?? I know, that's cheating ! :P

sf even bought B&O earphones, cost $880. He said they are much cheaper than in New York. He said he tried them when he was there and they sounded very good. Still. $880, about 50% of the cost of the ipod nano itself.

It's only been 2 days since holiday, and since bb has been here, but it seems long and I already miss bb. Tomorrow.

We have already touched on plan for next weekend; as pre-14th February because it falls on a weekday this year. :)

First day after CNY holiday. pretty quiet at work, both bosses were away. People were more relaxed. I happily went round the office (with reasonable limit, of course) and greeting everyone a good year. Got a few lai sees. All $20s. Even the one from office. Mean, yes. No surprise, yes. Same as last year.

Spoke to bb a few times :) she's pretty busy. I was ok. That stupid Richard played God again - telling me to do this and that and after I have done them, he'd be happy to look at them for me. I thought, "That's very kind" in a sarcastic way. He's so arrogant.

bb and I agreed to watch movie this weekend. We also agreed on the venue, Sunday for 2:30pm. As I'd be tied up for other things on the following evenings before then, I dropped by the cinema to get the tickets. Unfortunately, they only sell tickets 3 days in advance, which means I could only get those tickets on Friday the earliest. That include sale on the internet too. What shall I do? I'll be tied up in the following evenings !

Just went I got through the main door, I could smell Jasmine. I've been sitting in front of the tv tonight, surfing. There's soft breeze tonight. I could smell Jasmine from where I'm sitting, delivered by the soft breeze. How lovely, soothing and relaxing. I love it. Most of the flowers are opened now. It's been very warm in the last few days. I always get Jasmine during CNY when they are available in abundant. This year, I also bought Chrysanthemum. Purple and orange. I thought the colour would crash, but somehow they sit and compliement each other very well. It certainly adds to the mood of CNY.

Been thinking of where to go with my parents. Bangkok? Onsen? I feel a little uneasy going with them. I am no good at taking care of people. Worse still, I am so used to going with bb, who's smart, has an excellent sense of direction and great memory especially where streets and roads are concerned. Now, she's not coming and I have two dependents ... !

Finished the rest of bb's cooking - chicken coq en vin and roast potato - a portion that's probably enough for both of us. Then I had some sweet CNY cake from mum. I could think of one word now. Three letters. Fat.

Got an sms from sf. He just got back. Meeting up tomorrow afternoon. Would he have got me the book from Morrie himself that I dropped a hint? Probably not. :P

Attended Sunday church early this morning. The service was going to be broadcasted. It's going be my first broadcast, lucky not a solo. Got up at around 7am, took taxi and got to the Church by around 8:40am. We were to meet at 8:45am so I was early. When I got there, I was the only one there, except Diana - one of the staffs at Church. My teacher was probably around but I didn't see her, probably busy with the broadcast's arrangement. In fact, I wasn't so surprised. I noticed that people are habitually late for 10/15 minutes, whether social gathering, practice for the choir, church, and so on. I'm sure there's good reason. But sometimes I thought well, even I, someone's who's not baptised yet, is punctual ... Anyway, that's not my business and it doesn't bother me. I usually busy myself with little things like putting the hymn books and liturgy books out for the choir, or read the verses of hymns softly to myself, humming or singing softly to myself of those hymns. They are wonderful. This morning, I took the chance to pray.

Choir practice started at around 9am. Before that, I already received two lai sees from one of the couples ! I enjoyed the practice; people were serious. A different Father came and spoke to us. He's good. His speech was a little dramatic. My teacher did the commentary, played the role as the chairlady. It went well. Everything. The choir deserves a particular mention. I really enjoyed today's service. When I got home, I listened to the service from the radio on internet. It's great. As of now, I heard the whole service again twice, and the hymns about 4 times. I know I'll ask for more of that. In particular, it has one of my favourite hymns - Like a Shepard, Grant to us O Lord and Thank you Lord. I feel privileged to be at the service and be a part of the team. Listening to the broadcast brings me back the moments I was at the service and the teaching I learnt today. I hope I will keep this up, that this will not be heat for 3 minutes only, and if possible, I would follow this for the rest of my life.

My teacher treated us with a very nice cake today. It's Malaysian. She said it's from God. She explained that when she got in, the cake was already on her desk. She didn't know whom from. So it was from God. She meant it. What lovely and adorable sense of humour she has!

Other people gave me lai sees too. Together I got 10, even one from the staff at the church mentioned earlier in this entry.

Watched a bit of tv, after I had a Korean instant noodle and fish that mum prepared for me yesterday. Then I napped. I was so tired, and I think I really looked like a panda - big black circle round my eyes! Went to CNY fair with bb last night, and didn't sleep until after 3am. I was drooling before that. Finally, I slept on the couch. It's sunny today and I think temperature went up to about 20 degrees. I just let the very warm sunshine flow on me. That was nice.

sf sent me an sms and we had a few exchanges of that. He's still in NY, returning on Wednesday.

bb came over last night. We got up "early" (around 10/11am?) and started off early. Went to the local covent garden. Walked around once, decided what we wanted, and when we got back to get them, the street was packed already! It was only around 4pn. Wow! But we got what we wanted :)

Got bb's pre-ordered bedding packs and got home to leave the shopping and took a rest before we went off again. bb was meeting her friends who she hasn't seen for a long time, one came back from Singapore. me? I attended dinner with my family. Haven't seen Dad for a long time and he's back tonight. I was soooooo happy to see him. Dinner went well, although my elder brother and his family were away on holiday. Mum brought a bottle of red wine and we finished it, no problem !

It was around 10pm when we finished dinner. Wanted to go to CNY fair. Although I wanted to go with bb, but didn't want to push her as bb didn't like crowds, and that kind of fair is usually packed like sardine. We agreed that I'll give her a call when I've finished. So I did. bb was having dessert with her friends. So my younger brother, his wife and I took a stroll. We walked from Central to Wanchai/Cuaseway Bay. They went to join their friends for karaoke - $300 per head ! I strolled to a department store and bought a lip gloss that my sister in law and I were talking about during dinner. I bought a different colour. More bright red as I have darker lips and I'd be wearing it without make-up.

Whilst I was about to go into the fair, bb called. Then she took a cab. We met up and went together ! I was thrilled. I know it's a lot of effort from bb. Oh, bb is so nice.

Didn't get anything but it was nice. We had fun commenting on the silly but pretty creative/ innovative toys people came up with. And because it's so sardined, bb hugged me all the way. :)

It was getting late, or very late, and we decided not to do the whole fair. By the time we showered and got to bed, it was after 3am already. I've got to get up early tomorrow - Church service would be broadcasted tomorrow and we need to be there by 8:45am for practice. Oops.

NB This entry was written on 31 Jan 2006 but was back-dated

mm didn't left the office until 1:30am last night (or this morning?!) Got in the office by around 9:15am this morning. superwoman ! It was difficult to get out of bed this morning, but I did. The stupid boss kept saying ask for an extension to file and serve the documents. I said nothing. Worked very hard today. We (Colleague and I) were ready by around 3pm, so there should be ample time to deal with filing and servie. That stupid boss only started reviewing it the final time around lunch and kept amending them. If the amendments were worth it, that's fine. But he got very bogged down on one thing and didn't know how to let go. In the end, the documents left our office around 4:10pm and our colleague had to make it to the court in 10 minutes before it closes at 5pm. But we made it - yeah!

I was very tired but very excited because we made it ! I left office around 6:15pm, and went to UNI. Picked up the shirt that I bought over last weekend. Then shopped for new bras - and I bought 4 - ha ha ha :D I also rewarded myself with sushi and sashmi - yum - although bought a bit too much.

I also feel lucky because I got an email from Maisie - we met in school when I was around 15, I think - and her family (including her son) is coming back at the end of Feb for 2 weeks - hurry!

I feel happier today and more at ease at work. Could it be because bb came over last night?

Met up with two friends I met only last year. The girl and I used to be colleagues - she worked in the Commercial Department - and we worked on the same transaction. We become very good friends. Then I came to know her bf. He's spanish. Very nice guy, obviously very much in love with my ex-colleague. You can tell by the way they interact. You should see how he dotes on her.

And because of that, and because I too am a very nice and adorable person (!), he is very nice to me too. We three met up for lunch today and we talked about using Mac. They chased me for photos and clips of NZ. I said I didn't know how. He talked me through it and when he got back to office, he sent me this email:

"Seeing as you already have iLife 05 (which is iPhoto, iDVD and Garageband) on your laptop I thought I would mention iLife 06 to you at lunch since its only 790 HKD and gives you some cool new features. You can buy it online from the Apple store at www.apple.com (remember to change your location to "Hong Kong").

Here's some iDVD tutorials!
http://www.apple.com/ilife/tutorials/idvd/id2-4.html"

Although I am stuck here, I'm comforted by those around me. May be this is how I will learn and treasure those around me.

I don't know what's wrong with me in the last few days and today. I'm just not in the mood of working. I know I know, that's probably the norm for the general working population. And for me, it's probably true ever since I grow to dislike this company. But the negative emotion has struck me particularly hard in the last few days and today. Take this morning for example, It's now coming up to 12 noon. What did I do this morning? I came in around 9:20am, had my breakfast and coffee, went through a few administrative emails, and then been searching for the relevant documents in order to prepare a draft reply to a letter. I have some idea as to what goes into the draft reply, but I'm just soooooooo demotivated. I really want to get out of here. I've been feeling so since March last year. Friends persuaded me to stay a bit longer and see (I joined this company January last year), and so I did. No bonus, and my salary was only increased modestly. ok, salaries tend to get plateau when you get to my level, but something is just lacking. I find I'm not interested in the work I get given. I'm bored out of my mind. It's not intellectually stimulating and the stupid partner always has imaginery and wishful vision - but I guess he is just being himself !

All these sounds negative, frustrated and depressing, I know. I have been speaking to recruitment agents, have gone ahead with 2 companies, and have been waiting to hear from them. I got a call from one of them saying that they found my CV very interesting, but there's a change of their business strategy in that they now want a mid-level person, not someone of my level, and may re-visit my CV if they want someone senior. Sad.

I've been praying to God to get me out of here asap. I've also said to myself that this is God's plan. I'm only human and therefore I don't understand why I'm here and why I'm still here. I say to myself that I need to have more faith in God and whilst I don't understand His work now, I'll do some day later. It's a bit like the book I'm reading now, although it says that your life would be explained to you when you go to heaven. Things don't happen by co-incident. They happen for a reason. Just that I don't understand now and I desperately hope that I'll move on soon.

Went to church yesterday as usual. After the regular mass, we had dim sum lunch and held "sharing" after that.

For lunch, we went to the nearby restaurant.

What I didn't know if that dim sum lunch at Saturdays and Sundays are half-price ! As one of them said, the restaurant made money out of us on weekdays!

When we were walking back to the centre where "sharing" will be held, the conductor for our Sunday church came and said to me "I think your mum and my mum are having dim sum lunch together now." I was shocked, whilst trying to understand what he had just said ! I only joined their group October/November last year and only see them once a week when we attend mass and practice hymns. Plus I don't speak that much in our group. I cold-called my teacher in the first place, enquiring if there were doctrine classes. Now, you can see how shock I was. Really !

Then he said he's auntie Cecillia's son. Then my phone rang and my mum verify. Apparently, my mum bumped into auntie Cecillia when they attended Sunday church yesterday. They decided to lunch together. Auntie then suggested to mum to ask me to join them too. Then my mum told her I was not available because I was attending Sunday church at another church. Then auntie said her son goes to that church too. Then you can guess what happened next. Small World !

I was still in shock when I met bb later for dinner. So shock that I kept babbling about this, and about auntie and her son, etc.

The shock is probably over, but I still couldn't believe it. As I said to bb, I wanted to remain "anonymous."

That reminds me of what's said in the book I'm reading - Five People that you meet in Heaven. It says that those who cross your path do so for a reason, just that it may not be apparent to us. It also says, "Strangers are just family you have yet to come to know." I'm enjoying that book. It's very inspiring and really touches me and makes me reflect on what I do and how I do things.

bb is such a good listener. :)

PS you might ask why I'm still here, in the office, not going home. I'd love to but my stupid boss is out but he has asked me to wait for his return. I plan to go and pick up my free sample of facial cream of a brand I have always wanted to try. It's very expensive and I may be allergic to it so samples are good. I also want to get some new underwear for CNY. Stupid said he'll be back 7-ish. Fingers-crossed.

Just met with sf outside a cake shop at the tube station. He gave me a book he just finished - Five People. He said it's very good and insisted on lending it to me to read.

I've got it. It's now in my bag.

I'll start tonight on my way home. :)

mm's tummy was a little funny this morning, may be because of deadline.

mm has a short hearing this morning before a judge known for her temperament at 9:30am. mm got up early and went into the office early, attended the internal breakfast meeting for a short while and excused herself to attend the court. when she got there and made herself known to the judge's clerk, it was 9:20am. so, ample time before the hearing.

so she went to the bathroom. she was conscious of the time. when she went into the court, the hearing had already started ! The judge wasn't pleased and just when she was about to had a go at mm for being late for hearing, smart mm looked at the clock on the wall, and the Judge followed mm and turned her head to read the clock. It said exactly 9:30am! yes! The judge then just asked mm to take her seat. Phew. That was close.

The judge gave mm the order she asked for. mm got lucky! :)

bb got her evaluation yesterday and she sent it to me. I read it - she got very high marks, and got marks higher than her peers! She got particularly high marks for intellectual abilities!

mm is very proud of her! :)

went home and had din din with mum tonight. excellent food, always guaranteed! had chicken and potato curry, beancurd and fish balls with veg in soup, and Chinese sausages. yum yum.

when I got out of the tube station, I got a call from mum. she asked if I have keys to home. I said no. Then she told me that she and the maid was locked in in the kitchen! That's right, in the kitchen, not simply locked in! I can't imagine how they managed that. I felt sorry for them, and was worried - what if they wanted to go to the washroom? So I jumped onto a mini van, got the keys from my flat, took a taxi and ran back home, and "rescue" them. what a relief when I saw them. phew.

I noticed that a new furniture shop has opened in North Point. It looks nice and large. Would bb be interested to go with me say, this weekend? We could then get mini van no. 56 home. :)

I've sent the dolphins photos available on this site to a few of my friends: little gordon, uncle leather, sam and raf, and sf. The response are all complimentary. 3 if not all 4 of those photos were taken by bb.

sf said, "The photos are fabulous. Awesome!!!! Wowwwwwwwwwwwww!!!!!"

I'm very happy and very proud ! :D

I've called mum. Hopefully I can have din din with her. It's been a while since we have din din together and since I see her !

PS yeah, deadline today.

I was just tidying my desk in the office and one of the yellow posted note said this:

"Revenge is a fish best eaten cold."

sf told me this some time before, but I don't know where he got is from. I quite like it and want to record it before it went astray.

I'm becoming a fan to The Times published in the UK. The English is sooooooooo much better than any of the crap English newspapers you get here. In particular, I'm becoming a fan to the columnist, David Pannick QC. I'd like to have a chance to work with him and see what he's really like. Here's another great article he had written recently.

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Law

The Times December 13, 2005

And the winners are...
By David Pannick, QC
Foolish judges, noisy counsel and wacky law suits - the howlers and humours of 2005

AT A preliminary hearing of his trial in Baghdad, Saddam Hussein refused to obey a request to state his full name, asking the court “Are you judges?” There were a large number of candidates this year for the award for the judge who least looked the part.
The United States Court of Appeals, Ninth Circuit, allowed an appeal from an immigration decision by Judge Nathan Gordon which it described as “literally incomprehensible” and appearing to be “an unedited version of a badly transcribed, rambling set of oral observations”. The Hong Kong Court of Final Appeal decided that the decision of Mr Justice Yam after a 172-day trial of a dispute about the will of billionaire Teddy Wang was “blatantly wrong”, and “unbalanced and unjudicial”. Counsel described one aspect of the trial as “a cock-up”. Lord Scott of Foscote (one of the judges) commented that this was “a description from which I do not dissent”. But the winner of the award for least judicious judge is Franklin Jones, of New Hampshire, who resigned after groping five women at a conference on sexual assault and domestic violence.

Most unusual sentence of 2005 was imposed by Judge Lauri Blake in Dallas, Texas. As a condition of probation for an offence of drug possession, the judge ordered Christina Brazier, 17, not to have sex so long as she lived with her parents and attended school. Judicial question of 2005 was from Judge Seddon Cripps at St Albans Crown Court. Puzzled by the concept of a “sofa bed”, he asked a witness: “How can a bed be turned into a sofa?” Flexible judge of the year was Caroline Ludlow, sitting at Ipswich Crown Court, who sentenced a defendant, Aftab Ahmed, to 140 hours of community service by mobile phone when a traffic jam delayed his appearance in court.

Most embarrassing apology by a barrister was from Hong Kong counsel Roderick Murray, for his false statements to the press outside the District Court that he had sex on two occasions with the female judge before whom he had just made a drunken appearance. He was suspended from practice for six months. Most acrimonious dispute of the year between judge and lawyer was at Harrow Crown Court, where Judge Sanders asked Justin Bearman, counsel for the Crown in the case of a man cleared of rape, how long he had been a barrister. When Bearman replied “long enough”, the judge responded, “but everything you say is utter rubbish”.

Oddest defendant of this year (and any year) was Michael Jackson, who a California jury found not guilty on charges of child molestation. During the trial he brought his “personal magician”, Majestic Magnificent, to sit with him. After the verdict, Jackson sent each juror an armband inscribed “Love Always”.

The Jackson trial also resulted in other awards. Witness of the year was television chat-show host Jay Leno, testifying for Jackson. At the conclusion of his evidence he turned to the jury and said, “I have Renée Zellweger on the show tonight”. The prize for inaccurate legal scoop of 2005 goes to the Daily Star for reporting (almost credibly in the context of such legal lunacy) that Jackson would call as his star witness Bubbles, his pet chimpanzee, with California’s famous ape, Koko, a sign-talking gorilla, acting as interpreter.

The Jackson trial was also commended in the category of enthusiastic prosecutor of the year after Tom “Mad Dog” Sneddon began his opening statement by shouting so loudly that the court’s sound system malfunctioned. But the winner of the award was the Arkansas prosecutor hoping for a useful witness who subpoenaed everyone to whom a defendant in prison awaiting trial for murder had sent letters. Including his dog.

Least persuasive testimonial for a judicial appointee was President George W. Bush’s comment that his personal lawyer, Harriet Miers, is “plenty bright” and so was being nominated by him to fill a vacancy on the Supreme Court. When it became obvious that the Senate would not confirm her as bright enough, Miers wisely asked for her nomination to be withdrawn. A special award this year for the provision of too much information by a Supreme Court nominee: it goes to John Roberts, the new Chief Justice of the United States, who jokingly told the Senate Judiciary Committee, in response to criticism that he was not forthcoming in answer to questions, that his favourite films are Doctor Zhivago and North by Northwest.

Most foolish judicial decision of the year was the injunction granted by a court in British Columbia, Canada, after a bookshop inadvertently broke the embargo on the sale of the latest Harry Potter novel by a few days. Customers who had already bought the book were prohibited from reading their copies until after the official publication date. Least credible interpretation of the Human Rights Act was the ruling by managers at Calderdale Royal Hospital in Halifax, West Yorkshire, that visitors to the maternity wing should not fawn over newborn babies because of their right to privacy.

Among the important civil claims this year, the £850 million misfeasance claim brought by the liquidators of BCCI against the Bank of England collapsed after 256 days in court. The European Court of Human Rights stated that you have the right to marry your former mother-in-law, that a general ban on voting by all prisoners breaches their human rights and that two campaigners who distributed a leaflet libelling the McDonald’s fast food chain were denied their rights to free speech and to a fair hearing.

The Michael Howard-David Blunkett award for the Home Secretary with the coldest relationship with the legal profession goes to Charles Clarke, who told the House of Commons that he had “spent decades of my life being patronised by lawyers, and I do not appreciate it”. Lord Woolf retired as Lord Chief Justice. His successor, Lord Phillips of Worth Matravers, commented that politicians should realise that judges “are all trying to do our jobs to the best of our abilities”. A former Home Secretary, Lord Hurd of Westwell, wisely observed that “obnoxious people of all descriptions tend to have good lawyers”.

A new category of award this year, for the client with the largest number of lawyers. The European Court of Human Rights rejected the complaint by Carlos the Jackal, once the most infamous terrorist in the world, about his prison conditions in France, pointing out that he had “received very frequent visits from his 58 lawyers”.

Cartoon of the year was by Pat Byrnes in The New Yorker. One lawyer says to another, “Remember, we can only afford to do all this pro bono because of how much anti bono pays”. Best legal headline was in The Sun. After Saddam Hussein threatened to sue the newspaper for printing pictures of him in his Y-fronts, The Sun responded with a threat of a counterclaim, under the headline: “We’ll sue the pants off you.”

As always, there were many contenders for most absurd lawsuit of the year. Pop star Bono successfully sued his former stylist in a Dublin court for the return of a pair of trousers and a hat that he said had “iconic status”. A prisoner in Romania is suing God for failing to save him from the Devil, in breach of the contract made at the time of his baptism. A woman in Brazil is claiming damages from her partner for failing to give her orgasms. And a special mention for the ridiculous legal dispute in which the radical preacher Abu Hamza refused to leave his cell to attend a preliminary hearing of criminal charges because of a disagreement over the length of his toenails.

But the winner of absurd lawsuit of 2005 is Marina Bai, an astrologer, who is suing the US space agency, Nasa, in a Moscow court for £172 million for launching a space probe into a comet, thereby, she alleges, “distorting my horoscopes”. No doubt she already knows the result of this, and all other lawsuits to be heard in 2006.

My friend Emily is going to NZ in Jan 2006 and asked for my advice on itinerary, motels, and so on. She only had a week, flying from Sydney. She wanted more to do with nature, rather than shopping. I recommended the south island and I gave her a summary of where we went and stayed in south island. Here is the email I sent her today. It's repeated here because it serves as a good summary.

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The costal scenic route in south island I had in mind is this: http://www.newzealand.com/travel/destinations/themed-highways/southern-scenic-route/southern-scenic-route_home.cfm We really wanted to go, but we didn't have enough time. We said if we go back, we'll do that route.

We stayed at the following motels in the South island:

Dunedin - Portobello. We like this very much and ranked this as the best of all motels we stayed in NZ. We didn't think the photos on its website have done them justice.

Queenstown - Colonial Village. This is a definite *no* ! We didn't like it at all and were glad to get out.

Franz Josef - Alpine Glacier. This is pretty good. The units are recently renovated. The owners were very nice and friendly, the best we have met in NZ. They gave us good tips as to which heli-hike tour offered best guide that we should join.

Christchurch - Milano. This is very nice and the owners were friendly too. There wasn't much to do at Christchurch and we did a day trip to Kaikoura for whale watching, which was great !

The owners at Alpine Glacier told us that they also travelled within NZ. Their advice is not to stay with motels with the Bella Vista chain as the rooms/units are small. Our own observation is that you should try to avoid big chains including Scenic Circle, especially if you are going in January, which I think is high season for NZ. We saw many Asian tours/coaches and they all stay with the big chains, presumably because they would have enough units to accomodate the entire tour !

Similarly for Milford Sound. We went on a cruise with a smaller "boat" than the large ones and we were glad we did. The large one (e.g. The Red Cruise which is fairly well-known) was packed with tour groups!

As for the car, we got it from Ezi-rent.

Do you or your friend have an ipod? We got a Tune Cast Auto for iPod which worked great and gave us many hours of pleasurable music!

It's the third day we returned from NZ. (returned on 24th Dec late afternoon). For the last two days, I stayed with her. Christmas mah. should be spent together. I wanted it to be so, although there are the usual tons to do after a two-week holiday - laundry in particular.

As bb said in her post, we shot tons of pictures. More than 2800 in all. Got a few videos with my camera too. We are both writing up about our trip so they will be posted later. Just be patient, and more patience for my bit please, as bb has already started writing and sorting photos, and she is the efficent one. Always!

I said I'll visit my brother and his family today. But my tummy hasn't been too good. no pain, but just uncomfortable. may bve I had too uch for hte last 2 weeks. that's an excuse in a way. I got up a bit later today, 7:30am. Got up, started washing machine for my laundry, and went back to bed hoping to sleep a bit more but couldn't. So I got up and caught up the tv program while I was away. Done that by 4:30pm. Yes, in other words, I spent today in front of a tv today. What really changed my mind was my state of mind. I was emotional. The tv program was about a solicitors' firm, not really one of those what bb calls emotionally-manipulating programs. but from time to time, I couldn't help sobbing away. I don't know if I'm fraid of tomorrow (because I need to return to work) or I simply miss my sis which I've been doing so for the last week. When I attended mass on Sunday morning, I was listening to what Father had to say to us, but at one stage, tears filled my eyes and I was sniffing. I wanted to run to the washroom to cry. I missed my sis so much! the memory of going to masses with her in Christmas was flooding in my head. I had to really control myself. We still have to sing the hymes.

Then came the part where we wished everyone "Peace be with you." I kept a low key, as I have always done in Sunday church. I smiled and still wished people peace as everyone does. But the smile on my face must be odd.

Yesterday, I went to the church's x'mas party. I don't know that many people, and am still struggling to memorise my Sunday church group. I kept smiling. In fact, I was starting to feel tired because of jet lag. It went well. The performance by the kids who attend Sunday church was really good. It was very sweet. But somehow, I didn't feel part of them. I didn't feel I fit in wel.. May be that's because I still don't know them well. It takes time. May be I'll feel more comfortable later.

Partners' meeting this year will be held tonight at 5 p.m., so I was told. I'm not entirely bothered about whether I'll be made up or not, as I don't even think I've been put forward for this year. As I said to sf, it's a matter of time for me to leave this firm, whether they are going to make me up or not.

Strangely, throughout the whole of last night, I have this hymn in my heart, ringing in my ears:

"If you pass the raging water in the sea, you will not drown. If you passed the ... you will not be harmed. If you stand in barren land all because of me. Know that I am with you through it all.

(Chorus) Be not afraid. I go before you always. Come, follow me, and I will give you rest."

Really, the whole of last night, this morning, and even now! It's one of my favourite hymns. It reminds me I'm not alone and that I should have faith in God. We are too stupid to know the meaning of the current situation. It may dawn to us one day, it may never do.

I sent an sms to sf at lunch time, told him that partners' meeting is at 5pm and asked if he would be interested to go and get his ipod then. Yes, he said he wanted one that he can bring with him when he exercises in the gym. Still waiting for his reply.

He asked me what I want for Christmas this year. I said (in an sms last night): "You! Pls put a nice bow on it, n that has to be pink. n I won't settle for anything less :P " ha haa haaa!!

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sf called at around 2:30pm - I thought he'll call this evening and said he was in a meeting or something. We discussed the various models of ipods, and I (being mc) made enquiries with Apple Centres. It turned out the mini ipod is not made anymore, and all 4GB nano are sold out. sf wanted a 4GB so I called the shop back, left my name and phone number. They have no date as to when they would next receive nanos, but they said we were looking at Jan 2006. I left my name and number nevertheless. But sf was a little short. I feel he was just disposing a matter, and responded to my sms as a matter of courtesy. Oh well, may be he's offended by my sms last night about the bow in pink??

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My supervising partner came into my office this evening. He confirmed what I always suspected - I wasn't even put forward for this year. He said the issue was my billing. He asked me focus on that this year and I'll be put forward for next year. He said 3 were put forward for this year: 2 corporate finance and 1 from insurance litigation. They had outstanding billing and were of similar seniority to me, if not more senior. There's also political issue. He said everyone has their own people to protect and everyone wants to broaden their own base. Fair enough. I asked if my billing, although better than Richard, is the only issue. He said that's the most important issue. I told him it's not been entirely easy to work with that idiot partner and that's an understatement. May be that's because the case we are working together got so personal. I told him the opposite side is probably going after me next, in light of what the other side's partner said to me the life in Court today. I said that idiot partner has been making unfounded allegations against me e.g. he's concern about timing and quality of my work. The truth is that timing became an issue when he sat on the matter, and quality is stylistic changes he would like to make. My supervising partner however gave me an impression that if I have the requisite billing next year, he could deal with the others.

My supervising partner said he'll try to get a good salary increment for me this Thursday when the matter is discussed. He said that's another ground for putting forward for promotion.

I had work to do but I had no motivation after that chat. I'm and I'm not disappointed. To me, it's a matter of time when I'll move on, as I don't like this firm. As I said to sf before and repeated this evening, I'll move on when there's something better, even if they make me up this year.

THe above is the second time I'm typing this mail. When I was typing the previous paragraph for the first time, when I'm close to the end, the screen flicked and all gone. May be that's an indication that there's enough moan and groan.

I told sf and bb the above. Both of them were very, very supportive. I told sf that I had enough of politics and that's why I wanted to be a magistrate. That said, I've been reflecting on his words about his objection to the idea: Am I running from life?? sf said it's politics that made him made up his mind to have his own chamber. At the time, he had enough too. sf said again may be I should have stayed with my old firm. I reminded him how badly was my previous partner was behaving. I went into his office with a file in my hand one evening and he asked if I'm handing in my notice! Lucky I was. What if I wasn't? That would be unthinkable. sf said he could have brought enough pressure for me to stay until the end of the case. I said yes, but there may not be a place where I can go then.

It's easy with hindsight, but with this kind of things, not even hindsight can assist. (11:07pm)

Read bb's post re PB1. Sorry bb, that she has a lot of bills and wants new toys and I can't afford the two of us. sf has repeated today that he won't be my referee for permanent magistrate post. He's very supportive and has the highest regard for my ability. I'm not sure now. One thing he said right is that being a magistrte is very much running from reality. Do I want to be runner?? Would I regret it later, if I do?? The benefit of staying in private pratice is really a chance to earn enough so bb can stay home. May be she can write a book?? I only what her to do what she wants and enjoys doing, then I'm happy.

Personally, I feel I'm at a crossroad - confused and don't know what to do. I should pray more and have more faith in God. sf and I agreed today that God has everything planned. What seemed depressed when we lost soooo many times in that litigation we now have a miracle!

I'm a really happy person today. A few good things have happened:

1. bb's back (and she got me panda (sp) cake :) )
2. the charge against my client was dropped.
3. my best friend here told me where she's going - that's a very good city firm! (although I'll miss her ... )
4. sf called today. he said he's going to suggest to my client that I be instructed on some of the files on her other litigation! I was thrilled and flattered! That may not happen in due course, because it very much depend on my client, and she's against this firm because of the bad experience in the past - of ocurse, before I joined here lah. At the same time, I asked sf to do me a favour - to act as my referee re my character for my application as a magistrate. I'd expect him to say ok, but he said "no" ! no matter what I said, he said no. he even said if I put his name down and he's asked, he'll say I'm such a bad person that I'm unfit to be a magistrate! He said he disagree because I'm such a good litigator. I thanked him for that and said I want to get out of here asap, and there is an exit. I said I want a happy life. He said I'll be bored out of my mind. I said if that's the case, I can re-join the private practice or what not. We agreed to meet tomorrow and discuss. Question is : would we really meet?? :D

I've been thinking of bb a lot this week. much more than the last occasions when she's away. I kept looking at the clock today waiting for her plane to touch ground, and I would call her. But she called before I did - yes, she beat me again! well, nothing new. :)

Just had my dinner. seafood and spagetti in white cheese sauce. got it from Canteen downstairs. taste ok, a bit rich. As I'm soooo happy, I rewarded myself with a hot Korean juice. It costed me an extra $10. I usually just have tea that's available in the office (andI'm still here working) I'm so mean. :P

Dinner was a takeaway. I got 2 spoons for my spagetti and no fork! I used a pair of chopsticks :D

On my way back from Canteen to the office with my din din, I think of bb again. There was an urge to see her. It's already 8:40pm. I'll see her soon. :)

sf called at 7pm and we spoke. no hot chocolate, naturally. told him bbmm's itinery. he must had been envious. He kept saying we should have hired a convertible. I said we are poor. In fact, the one thing I really tried to get for our car is a CD player. They said they will try to do their best but no guarantee. What did we do? We bought a TuneCast Auto for iPod. I told sf about it and explained to him what it does. sf was impressed. He praised me for being so good at these things. Well, only if he knows bb. May be I should avoid the two of them meet! :P

For picture and other users' reviews, click here. There are pros and cons. In short, there are reception problems (signal overlap) in busy areas. Also, sound quality is in issue. The good news is that it works as a charger, which is very helpful. The metal arm is adjustable but stays put once you let go. Stands up and stays out of the way. (Also has different size rings in case your cigarette adapter is a different size.) Display is clear, and choosing and setting a frequency and/or preset is pretty easy. But, realistically scrolling through the iPod menus while driving takes more attention than one should probably devote to it. Better if you have a remote control for your iPod.

A happy thing happened today - I met mum briefly at lunch time today and we went to this LV flagship shop to shop for her handbag. My dad was lucky in the gold market and he gave $$ to mum for her buy a LV handbag. How very nice and sweet! It's not the money that counts, but it's the thoughts and gesture. :)

no, didn't have lunch with mum as I needed to rush back to office to work. I'd love to. :(

Wonder what bb is doing now. What's her time now??

It's my second day of annual leave. I took yesterday and today off. but I was in office for both days. Not only that, the plan was to take advantage of the previous Sat off, so I would have 4 days of holidays - a long weekend. That was ruin by my boss, who made me go into the office on Sat afternoon, claiming that he wanted to discuss the case with me, and that discussion took less than 10 minutes!

Called my brother today. He confirmed that his video camcorder had been repaired. When I asked him if I could borrow it, he said yes on the basis that it would be the same. The way it came out was odd, and it took me a little while to understand he was trying to say that don't break it, or he'll break my neck. Stupid and slow of me ??!

Can't believe we are off next Saturday to our trip that has been planned a few months ago - yeah! I've been thinking of what needs to be done, bought and brought today ...

Did a bit of shopping this evening. Had a shop in mind that I wanted to visit but didn't find it in the shopping mall close to where I live. Could it be that it doesn't have a branch at that mall?? But me being me, I still managed a few new items. Nothing fanciful. Just a few cotton pullovers that could go with suit or with jackets for casual wear. They are cheap - like around 3 quid each. Can't beat that, right?

sf called this afternoon. blamed me for not doing research for him. what's new??! he always blames me, for whatever. my reply? "Whatever!" :D he said let's meet tomorrow afternoon. I told him I have a telecon early afternoon and have a seminar at 6:30pm. He said we'll meet at 5:30pm, he'll call me then. I said ok. Let's see how that turns out.

I saw an ad. It's recruiting for permanent magistrate. funny enough, the ad also said if hired, it'd be for 3 years. so it's not permanent?? then my smart brother told me the structure is that initially 3 years contract. upon satisfactory performance, it'll be extended for another 3 years. And upon satisfactory performance of the extended 3 years, then, you'll become permanent.

In any event, I'm very interested in that position. I'll put in an application soon. The problem is I need to come up with the reason why I want to join the judiciary. Why? It's always been my aspiration.

These days I feel more relaxed, and generally happy. feel like up in the clouds. feel unreal. Why? A side of me is looking forward to a new chapter in a new country when I'll tact along with bb. It's a mistery to me. I heard a lot about that country, that particular town. But I've never been, and the huge uncertainty is whether I'll like it there, if I'll be able to get a job, and if so, what to do?? My working skills are portable, but not so portable. The other side of me would like to join the judiciary, if I get hired. Well, both are not real yet. I'll cross the bridge when it comes, in the meantime, I'll dream on!

I called the office yesterday and took a sick leave yesterday. No, didn't feel good at all. I told them I had a fever and flu. I felt feverish, had blocked nose, terrible headache, woke up middle of the night before suffering and wasn't able to get back to sleep.

I then went back to sleep until I got a call from a stupid client at around 9am. He asked how I was, and I told him I was ill off sick, obviously hinting that what's so urgent that he had to call on my mobile? Why did he not call the office?? It turned out that he wanted to know the opponent's address because he wanted to send the guy some flowers. Why? Because his opponent claimed he went into hospital for flu which had developed into pneumonia, and that was the afternoon before the day the hearing and the day that he had to file some documents with the Court. That's incredible! Too much coincident. But what do you do when your stupid client wants to send flowers to that guy, and in any event, your client is about a week late in sending those flowers if there's any truth in his opponent's illness.

I asked a secretary to call and tell him the address. Then I went back to sleep until about 1:30pm when mum's maid arrived. I had the chain on the door and all of a sudden, I heard someone trying to come in but the chain was in the way.

Then I thought that's pretty late. Got up and started a new Korean drama. Did nothing much.

Slept quite early last night (11:30-ish?) I woke up middle of the night again and was really suffering. Didn't sleep again until quite early this morning. Got up late and came in late this morning. Not the first and won't be last :P Feeling better now, although still have sore throat, runny nose, and feel tired.

I think it's also deadline today, which explains the illness. It means it might happen at the beginning of our trip in December 2005 ...

Came across two articles today. They are interesting in different respect. The first I find inspiring and I've highlighted the passages I like best. The second gives you an insight as to how the parties in the same piece of litigation see the litigation itself, as claimed by their lawyers ...

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The Times November 15, 2005

Lawyer of the week: Nicholas Stadlen, QC

THE QC, of Fountain Court Chambers, acted for the Bank of England in the case brought by Deloitte, liquidator of the Bank of Credit and Commerce International (BCCI), claiming £1 billion. The liquidator withdrew its claim against the bank after a 12-year case; the most expensive in English legal history to date.

What was the most surprising aspect of the case? The fact that the action took 12 years. My own involvement started before that, on holiday in Wales on a Friday in August 1991 shortly after the collapse of BCCI, with a telephone request for some advice. Nothing very onerous. Should be done and dusted by Monday. I should have asked “Which Monday?”

What was your worst day as a lawyer? Failing abysmally as a pupil to get an order for costs on behalf of Dan Air, which had just been acquitted in a criminal trial at the Old Bailey. My misery was compounded on my return to chambers when I was castigated for walking down Fleet Street still wearing my court bands. A career as a dustman seemed quite appealing at that moment. The next day, my pupil master Denis Henry (as he then was) got the order reversed and told the judge to pick on someone his own size next time.

What was your most memorable experience as a lawyer? Being hugged by the Governor of the Bank of England in court after the liquidators threw in the towel. It is hard to exaggerate the ordeal which some of the impugned bank officials and their families have had to endure in silence for 12 years, with the cloud of serious allegations of dishonesty hanging over them. There is, of course, nothing to beat winning, unless it is winning in a cause in which you passionately believe. My speech was very much a team effort. Nobody could have wished for a higher-calibre, friendlier or more cohesive team: Mark Phillips, Bankim Thanki, Ben Valentin, Henry King, Tom Smith and a small army at Freshfields.

Who has been the most influential person in your life and why? Apart from my mother, who was a fearless champion of the underdog, and my father, who was a model of intellectual and personal honesty, the greatest influence on my life was my self-deprecating and much admired school Latin teacher, Dr Cruickshank. He practised and preached clarity of thought, precision of expression, love of language and, above all, simple humanity. On my first day in his class, he memorably concluded his preview of the next seven terms’ work with the warning: “Eh, you take Christmas Day off at your peril.”

Why did you become a lawyer? I care about justice.

What would your advice be to anyone wanting a career in law? (1) If you don’t seriously care about justice, do something else. (2) Don’t read law at university if you can afford not to.

Where do you see yourself in ten years’ time? Not making submissions in the House of Lords in another BCCI appeal.

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The Times November 08, 2005

The rot set in as soon as the record speeches began
By Edward Fennell
The question being asked in the City is how did the BCCI case get as far as it did?

THERE was an uncanny symmetry between the two biggest political and legal stories last Wednesday. While David Blunkett was on the point of announcing his resignation by his non-appearance before a House of Commons select committee, so Gordon Pollock, QC, for the liquidators in the BCCI case, was throwing in the towel in the action against the Bank of England.
In both instances the timing of the announcements — virtually simultaneous by two big men with beards — came as a complete surprise. And yet there was also an underlying inevitability about them and had been for some time. So two questions arise. How could such bad judgments have been exercised by experienced people so as to create the mess in the first place? And, given that fact, why was the plug not pulled much sooner? Because in terms of BCCI, according to Nick Stadlen, QC, counsel for the Bank of England, the Deloittes case was a non-starter — “Hopelessly misconceived and doomed to failure”.

In the past week there has been much coverage of the details. But there remain also some more fundamental questions and issues for the future — especially given that this BCCI debacle comes so hot on the heels of Railtrack and Equitable, all quasi-class actions and each equally unsuccessful.

First, what kind of strategies lead to these cases being brought at all? After all, Lord Justice Tomlinson observed that “the very serious allegations of impropriety and dishonesty are wholly without foundation”. Hugh Evans, of DLA Piper, says that the case must not be viewed in isolation but within a much larger campaign. The aim adopted by the BCCI liquidators was to recover as much money as possible and, in justice, they had been unbelievably successful. Put bluntly, they were on a roll and their success could be interpreted as being based on seeking out the maximum number of targets. So long as they won more than they lost, they would come out on top. “They had gained a massive victory against the Bank of India and they could reasonably claim that while going up against the Bank of England was risky it was already balanced out by the Bank of India,” Evans says.

In other words, there was a momentum driving the case almost regardless of the details. It was a game of poker in which nerve, determination and depth of pockets counted for as much as the nature of the evidence. Indeed, Lovells almost hinted as much when it claimed that the outcome was influenced by the resources that the Bank was prepared to throw at it. The Bank of England’s position was that “normal commercial considerations do not apply and it would not negotiate”. It was almost as if this gave the Bank an unfair advantage. (Although, one lawyer pointed out, if this is the case you had better be absolutely sure that the documentary evidence gives you a winning hand. In Lovells’ case it did not.)

Secondly, why aren’t the Woolf reforms having more impact on these cases? As Val Davies, of Norton Rose, puts it, Equitable and BCCI together prompt concerns over “whether the aims of the Woolf reforms are being realised”. Certainly lawyers in the City last week were puzzled why Lord Justice Tomlinson did not intervene some time back, maybe in the summer, if (as seems likely) he had doubts about where the case was going. “I’d point my finger at the system, ” Nick Pearson, of Baker & McKenzie, says. “There is a need for more intervention, more costs enforcement and to take hold of cases more aggressively.”

So the effectiveness of the Woolf reforms must come under question after this case. “The rot set in as soon as Gordon Pollock started on his record speech,” Evans says.

Perhaps, then, a critical lesson for the future is the need for the courts to guard against larger-than-life personalities for whom opening a leading case is an aria rather than a distillation of the facts and arguments. “Perhaps in the spirit of Woolf, the judge should at least have restricted the length of the opening speeches,” Davies says.

Finally, there must be questions about who controls the liquidators and their lawyers. Technically, the liquidators do not have to follow creditors’ views, but perhaps they should be obliged to give them a little more attention. Bernard Clarke, who has acted for the English Liquidation Committee of BCCI SA since 1994, has made it clear that his clients wanted to throw their hand in some time ago. So if the liquidators push on regardless maybe they should share some of the costs. “The way that lawyers are paid whether they win or lose, at no risk to themselves, can contribute to these situations,” Clarke says. Perhaps they should put their money where their mouth is?

Finally, what about reputations? David Blunkett seems to have definitively left the big stage after last Wednesday. Whether another big man with a signature beard might opt to do the same was something that people were speculating on in the City last week.

I had a dream last night. Yes, it's nothing new. For some strange and odd reason, I dream alot, and bb doesn't. Is it me or bb who's strange and odd? It's your choice what you want to think :)

The emotion of the dream is calm. I dreamt that someone was speaking to me (can't remember who now). He/She spoke to me gently and wisely. He/She was explaining my weaknesses to me. In particular, why I have a problem with my boss. I don't remember the details. The gist is that I should be nicer to my boss - less critical and sharp. His judgment is weird and his ideas are soooo creative that no one in their right mind would do it! Yes, I admit - I don't have much respect for the guy and he's not intelligent. I am an Aries so I only respect those who are intelligent, even though I'm not. I know it's an excuse, but that's also me.

The dream tells me I need to change and respect those who are less intelligent and smart (so bold!!). And I am trying that. I like harmony not antagonism. I am fine so long the guy does not provoke me and I'll try not to be so easier provoked by the guy's idiocy and stupidity! :D

Only if he's 1% like bb or sf ... The other bosses here are mostly like him. Sadly.

Looks like bbmm will have a relaxing busy weekend. It works as follows:

Friday evening - no particular plan yet. Any suggestion is welcome.

Sat am - bb has a conference and mm needs to work.
pm - bb continues with her conference, whilst mm has a yoga class at 2pm. will finish around 4pm.

evening - meet up for high tea/early dinner. then Sound of Music at 8pm - yeah! bbmm wanted to go when they saw the poster some time ago, but didn't get round to getting tickets for it. mm's colleague sent an email yesterday to sell her tickets as she couldn't go anymore, and she was selling at less than half the price. mm got hold of bb and sent an email accepting the offer within one minute - and they got them! :D

In the meantime, bbmm thought about going to one of the 2 local pop stars' music concert. it'd be nice to go, but wouldn't feel that you have lost anything if you don't. So they didn't pursue it. And yesterday when they got the tickets for Sound of Music, they were congratulating on their inertia :)

Sunday - I need to be at church by 9am, and bb could sleep in?? nothing planned thereafter yet. May be stay at home? go cycling?? or foot massage???

Soooooo looking forward to it :)

Recently, I have been watching a lot of Korean drama and some movies. They are pretty addictive. They are generally really good, much better than the local ones. bb thinks, however, they are "emotionally manipulative." And yes, I cry over the really sad scenes.

So that started my interest in learning Korean. These days I have soooo many ideas in my head and therefore, soooo many things to fit into the diary! I've been looking for Korean classes but haven't found anything interesting. And I thought it'd be good to find a course that I can learn on the internet, so more flexible timing. I have since came across several websites that gives free Korean classes. Of course, they all are on very basic and preliminary stuff lah.

People always say that when you start to learn a language, you should learn the foul languages first. The idea (I guess) is that you should know when you cross someone! And I found this page that tells you exactly that in Korean :)

mm went to her first lesson since a few months ago. The venue is closeby to her office, so seems easier. So, from now on, mm will attend lesson every Monday during lunch. She is also invited to join the chapel choice and attend mass starting at 9am every Sunday! So, no more sleeping in for bbmm!

The father looks like an English. May be bb would join mm on to go to church on Sunday too? Then they can have breakfast, and continue with their other plans - or go home to keep the bed warm ...

It may also mean staying at bb's on Sat evenings would be easier, no? will see lah.

There's a memorial mass for my sis on Saturday at 7:15am. bb came over Friday evening but both of us over-slept! I went to bed early (around 11:30pm or 12am) and bb came in a bit later. I woke up to set the alarm when bb came in. I heard it going off on Saturday morning, but didn't press the "snooze" button. At about 8am, I woke up suddenly and the hands on the clock gave me a fright! Obviously, it's too late for the mass. Called parents to apologise. We then went to join them for breakfast before visiting sis. Hope she didn't mind :P

On both Friday and Saturday night, I woke up in the middle of the night and couldn't go back to sleep. The unusual thing is that I got so irritated and annoyed, for what I didn't know! It's certainly nothing to do with bb. I think I acted like a spoiled kid. Sorry bb. She was good - comforting me and put on a humourous VCD. That helped. I think bb's gentleness throughout helped most !

Yesterday, we stayed home all day. I felt indifferent to other things; felt a bit life-less. But bb was there for me *again*! I still don't know what got to me. As I said to bb, I can't imagine what I'd be like when I have to go through menopause, if I'm already acting unreasonably and strangely !

I had a bad dream last night. I don't remember all details. I remember that my fingers on my left hand were cut off ! They weren't cut off completely but the first section of them. I showed them to my family including my younger brother, but they were indifferent. I didn't feel pain not physically, but I felt the pain inside for the loss.

I enjoy a good relationship with my family, so my younger brother's reaction in my dream is not reflective of our relationship. I think it's reflective of my current situation though - It's a pain to be here and only I feel the pain, although others are sympathetic.

Wish I can leave *soon.* I'll drag bb for a drink on the day I hand in my notice.

I've got a date tonight - and so does bb (wink!).

We'll be going to one of our favourite restaurants for steaks on sizzling plates. It's an ordinary restaurant but one that has been around for ages. A 3-course meal costs about GBP 10. You get soup of the day (either a red (Borsch (bb, is this right?)) or white (cream of mushroom/chicken)), a main course served on a hot plate with a choice of sauce, plus tea or coffee. They pour the sauce over the meat on the hot plate in front of you, so it smells gorgeous! And so do you !

We both like it there. We are meeting at 6:30pm and I've been closely monitoring the clock since an hour ago.

Yes, that may not sound special to you, but it's special to me :)

sf is away with his brother. His brother needs a check up and he always goes with him. I think his brother needs one twice a year, so it's nice of sf to attend with him lah.

Had a row with him yesterday. The background was this: I was a little down and desperate the day before and yesterday, so I asked him if I should put myself forward for 2 companies: B and R. Our conversation went like this:

Re B, he went: "When how and why did they come to the reckoning?" Then I told him that I was going mad as I couldn't even discuss my queries with my boss without him taking it personally and going ballistic. I then also asked him re R.

He replied, "Mc: why B all of a sudden? I told you not to offer any view. That guy has an inferiority complex. Just agree with whatever he says until you leave."

My reply, "You are right about him No, I didn't offer any view. I didn't agree but still did it. I was stuck on a point, raised it n asked for his help. That's all."

sf's comments sometimes lost me completely.

I have a hearing fixed for 3 minutes tomorrow. It's on the opponent's application for more time to prepare their evidence. It's pretty routine thing but the dispute between the parties is hot.

Today, I prepared a 4-page long skeleton argument together with a 1-page chronology of events. I sent it to the opponent and the court at around 4pm. At 5:46pm, we got a letter from our opponent, saying that their client has been hospitalised for pneumonia! How credible can that be??! I think they should have said that person is a new case of suspected bird flu and has therefore been segregated. That would have been more credible!

Frankly, they must be scraping the barrel. Test it this way: the case will continue even if that person drops dead tomorrow. The world will continue to rotate in the way it does now.

Anyway, I have made a point in my skeleton that that person is not the only person knows about the allegations of our case. You see, the defendants are members of a family. I said in my skeleton, in fact, that person's wife should also know about the matters in issue, being a Finance Director. And yes, all disputes relate to $$$.

I'm trying to hynotise (sp) myself that that person is truly ill as I need a straight face tomorrow! And you should have seen me when I got the letter. It's so funny! I told my friends in the office and no one believes the other side. Naturally.

I sms sf too, but haven't yet heard from him. He must be busy. Well, anyway, it's his holiday, although he's abroad attending a medical check up with his brother (who needs the check up).

Sorry, their story could be true and I might be mean, but I think the chances of that is pretty dim ...

I have received the chicken fan card - thanks to bb who dropped in the application for me in time. Being a member, I get:

For Eat-in: free soft drink (medium)/tea/freshly grinded coffee

For delivery: 10% off for any delivery purchase over US$15 or any purchase of a la carte items.

There are also offers to new members!

Of course, I'm counting on bb to share the privilege :)

Came across this today. English not as pretty as the other one, but this is entertaining !

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The Times November 08, 2005

As God is his counsel . . .
Case Notes by Gary Slapper

RECOURSE to law by disappointed people is extensive. A Brazilian woman is attempting litigation against her partner for failing to give her orgasms, and a Romanian prisoner is trying to sue God for allowing him to sin.
The 31-year-old woman, from Jundiai, asserts in her case that her 38-year-old partner routinely ended sexual intercourse after he reached an orgasm. The claim has been referred to a judge. As such a ruling requires careful deliberation, there must be hope in Brazil that the judge is not prone, in the phrase of Sir John Mortimer, QC, to premature adjudication. In English law there is no legal matrimonial obligation to provide the satisfaction being sought in Brazil. In the context of claims for marriage nullity, the courts have considered the orgasm but dismissed it as having no legal significance. In a 1952 judgment, elegantly garnished with Latin, the High Court held that the necessary and sufficient conditions of vera copula (true sexual union) were simply erectio and intromissio, which amount to nothing more than the act of intercourse.

Pavel M., the Romanian prisoner suing God, founds his claim in contract. He argues that his baptism was an agreement between him and God under which, in exchange for value such as prayer, God would keep him out of trouble. Lawyers for the prisoner, who is serving 20 years for murder, have reported that they would be unable to subpoena God to appear in the case. Divine appearances have arisen in other court roles. In Ottawa, Canada, a man frequently appearing as a defendant was asked by the judge: “Who is your counsel today. Mr Finnerty?” The reply was: “Your honour, God is me counsel!” Turning to the prosecutor, the judge said: “That is pretty tough competition. Would you like an adjournment so that you might consider retaining outside counsel?”

THE High Court recently ruled that in some circumstances, ignorance of the law can be a defence. Contrary to Section 263(1) of the Companies Act 1985, It’s a Wrap (UK) Ltd had paid a dividend despite having made losses. The court decided that there was no obligation for the recipients to repay the dividend if they had no knowledge, or reasonable grounds for believing, that the payment contravened the law. The old maxim “ignorance of the law is no defence” does, however, have some authority. In 1802, Lord Ellenborough, Chief Justice, said that without the principle, the excuse “would be urged in almost every case”. In 1825, however, Chief Justice Abbott assuaged much anxiety in the legal world by declaring: “God forbid that it should be imagined that an attorney, or a counsel, or even a judge is bound to know all the law.”

THE chief of the Metropolitan Police traffic division was recently reprimanded for permitting his police chauffeur to drive at 82mph in a 40mph zone. Chief Superintendent Les Owen was not travelling to an emergency. The first person in Britain to be fined for speeding was the pioneer of the petrol-engine car, Walter Arnold. On January 27, 1896, when there were 20 cars in Britain, Arnold was driving through Paddock Wood in Kent at 8mph — four times over the 2mph limit imposed by the Locomotive Act 1865 for built-up areas. A police officer having his lunch in a nearby cottage abandoned his meal, donned his helmet and chased the car for several miles on a bicycle. On this occasion the long arm of the law was supplemented by powerful legs. The officer eventually apprehended Arnold, who was later fined one shilling (5p).

The author is Professor of Law, Director of the Centre for Law, The Open University, gary.slapper@thetimes.co.uk

This was posted on our intranet today. Sounds so unreal, and only if they have read the recent article that a solicitor working "part-time" these days means working from 9am to 5pm, Monday to Friday! And even that may be assuming that your boss acts reasonably and is sensible ...

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Be Healthy

A healthy lifestyle can help you perform and enjoy your everyday activities, including the time spent at your computer. Also, learning more about your health is an important step in staying comfortable and productive while using your computer.

To help maintain good health, try the following:

Eat a balanced diet and get adequate rest.
Exercise for overall fitness and to improve the strength and flexibility of your body. Consult a qualified health professional to help you choose the stretches and exercises that are right for you.
Learn to manage stress. One way to reduce stress at work is to plan your work area and schedule so that noise and distractions are kept to a minimum.
See a qualified health professional if you have questions about how your medical and physical conditions may be related to MSDs. While researchers are not yet able to answer many questions about MSDs, there is general agreement that many factors may be linked to their occurrence, including previous injuries, diabetes, hormonal changes (such as pregnancy), and rheumatoid arthritis.

Couldn't sleep the night before, may be because I slept too much during the long weekend! Last night was late, around 1:30am (?) - had to revise and update my CV and of course, a little bit of tv before bed :P

did a few things this morning, then went surfing on the net. came across a new astrology website that gives you your full birth chart i.e. the star on your Sun, Moon, Ascending, and so on. My "Sun" is in Aries and it says I have "a strong personality and an entrepreneurial spirit. I am ambitious and self-willed, stubborn, obstinate and tenacious. My weaknesses are nervousness, impulsiveness, wastefulness, provoking nature, restlessness and changeability." It sounds so negative! I thought these things are habitually positive. Poor bb!

The report is too long, sometimes contradictory and repetitive. For bb's purpose, positive things were said too! hee hee.

I dreamt of sis last night and cried myself to wake this morning. I cannot remember the details but remember I was very very sad.

bb called this morning, saying that she was very bored. me too, bored out of my mind and have been feeling so lately. I wasn't able to make her less bored as she had to run shortly afterwards.

The only thing exciting happened today was I got a call from the head hunter today. It's an in-house position with a US investment institute. They are big in US but has a relatively low profile here. It's a new position and has many reporting line - which I think it's not unusual given it's a US company. The role reports directly to the General Council in US. The interest bit is that that person would be part of management, although advising on legal matters, rather than a member of the in-house legal team. It sounded very interesting. The head hunter should have sent the job specification to me - yes, quite surprisingly, they have job spec. At least that shows they know what they are doing and have thought through the role that they want the new person to play. I'll read read it when I get at home tonight - no access to private emails here lah!

Hot yoga tonight - a short class, as I think my deadline is drawing close; have been craving since the last few days ...