She’s right, that Sylvia Plath, bless her. Yes, I established that one paragraph or one pic or whatever I like constitutes a blog post, but that’s everyday writing. Non-fiction. Doesn’t apply to fiction. That’s pretty much why I don’t write fiction as easily anymore, except for the annual nano-hand-wringing-exercise. Or why I only take pictures of food and travelling. My niece has started instagramming her sketches, and they are good. Reminds me of how I absolutely cannot draw. Or appreciate music, and forget about playing it.
So as my 10th nano approaches, I tell myself, this is the year. This is the novel that can be polished up to a real book. I’ve outlined, and broke the rules by writing the first few thousand words, and gotten a bunch of research saved in evernote.
Let’s see. Come back at the end of november and see how I feel about the end result. I’ll complete nano, I usually do but as ever, I’ll probably end up doubting and disparaging those 50k words. And then it’ll sit in its neatly archived folder doing nothing.
How to get out of the self-doubt hole? Loads of advice, like
getting support from others, finding a creative zone and just going for it. Others describe how to banish distractions and overcome imposter syndrome. All sounds a little dubious to me. Or may be my right brain is the one that needs fixing.
Apparently, the secret to creative success is to leave out brain cell hogging stuff like deciding on what to wear:
decision fatigue or making a bunch of small decisions like what to wear and what to eat wears out your brain and saps your mental power for more pressing matters
I could have told the author that doesn’t work. I pretty much wear the same hard rock café shirts all the time, and I don’t feel I have that much more mental power.
I know what the answer is of course. It’s so obvious. Shut down parts of the brain that thinks logically and pays attention. Blur your eyes. Get into a state of sleepiness or drunkenness. Drink beer. Look at the number of alcoholic writers, there probably is truth to the saying
there are famous drunk artists, but no famous drunk accountants
Hmm, how much whisky will it take?
Then again, just cut the bullshit and make time to write, it’s that simple.